[Sister Kitty]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Two Jewish children are sitting on top of a roof near a chimney. A passer-by asks, 'What are you doing there?' 'We are waiting for our parents.'

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

And i have my evidence here straight from the Bible.
Are you trying to tell me what the Bible says is fake?
If you truly are trying to tell me this you should look in the mirror before you try to correct others and look even more like a hypocrite

He is telling you that you do not understand what you read.

Let's see:

Jews worship God. Agreed?

Jesus is God. Do you think He worships Himself?

Jews believe Jesus is not the Messiah. Agreed?

Jesus, being God, knows He is the Messiah. Do you think He denies Himself?

Jews are human. Agreed?

Jesus is God. Do you think He thinks Himself human, when He is God?

Jews will spend eternity in Hell, like all non-Christians. Agreed?

Jesus will spend eternity in Heaven. Do you think He will condemn Himself to Hell for failing to believe in Himself?

Would you care to reassert that Jesus is a Jew?

[barton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Why does it suck to be a black Jew?
You have to sit at the back of the oven

A wonderful gift for a girl or boy in your life:


haven't seen this at my corner store yet:

[Cursed]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Jesus was a Jew

At the time His name was actually pronounced, "Yeshua," and that is the name used in this article.That Yeshua was born Jewish is one of the least contested truths of the Bible. The very first verse of the New Covenant reads: The book of the genealogy of Messiah Yeshua ("Jesus Christ"), the son of David, the son of Abraham (Matt. 1:1). Who were Abraham and David?

Abraham was the first Hebrew. God changed his name from Abram (Gen. 17:5). In Gen. 14:13 he is called Abram the Hebrew. So we can see that Yeshua (Jesus) is descended from "Abram the Hebrew." Even to this day, Jews are also called "Hebrews", and the language of the Jews is "Hebrew."

Abraham and his descendants were given the unconditional covenant of the Promised Land (Gen. 17:8) and the covenant of circumcision (Gen. 17:10). Abraham is the father of the Jews (Acts 3:12-25). Isaac was his son and Jacob was his grandson (Matt. 1:2). Thus, Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob are known as the Patriarchs, the fathers of the Jews.

Jacob's name was changed by God to "Israel" (Gen. 35:10-12) and he had twelve sons (Gen. 35:23-26) from whom come the Twelve Tribes of Israel. All of their descendants are known collectively throughout the Bible as the Children of Israel (Ex. 1:6-7).

One of those twelve sons was Judah (Gen. 35:23, Matt. 1:2) and it is from his name that we get the word 'Jew'. Although Yehudah (Judah) was only one of the twelve, by 700 BCE, because of the course of Israel's history, the word Yehudee (Jew) came to mean any person descended from Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob (Jer. 34:9). So, for instance, Saul haShaliach (the Apostle Paul) was of the tribe of Benjamin (Romans 11:1) yet he self-identified as a Jew (Acts 22:3).

Nevertheless, according to the Bible, the Messiah must be descended from the tribe of Judah (Gen. 49:10) as King David was (1Sam. 17:12, 1Ch. 28:4) and descended from King David himself (2Sam. 7:12-13, Isa. 9:6-7, Jer. 23:5-6). That is why the Messiah is called Son of David (Matt. 21:9).

Yeshua (Jesus) is from the Tribe of Judah (Heb. 7:14). His earthly father was descended from David (Matt. 1:6-16) and His mother was as well (Luke 1:27, 32-34, 3:23-31).

In addition, Yeshua was born King of the Jews (Matt. 2:2). The King of the Jews must Himself be Jewish (Deut. 17:15). His aunt Elizabeth was Jewish (a descendant of Aaron, Moses' brother) and His uncle Zacharia was a Jewish priest (Luke 1:5, 36). Yeshua was circumcised according to Jewish law (Luke 2:21, Lev. 12:2-3), and redeemed according to Jewish law (Luke 2:22-23, Num. 18:15). His mother atoned according to Jewish law (Luke 2:24, Lev. 12:6-8). He is called The Consolation of Israel (Luke 2:25) and The Glory of Thy People Israel (Luke 2:32). Jesus was born a Jew.

Worst Jew joke EVER.

[inSincere Sucker]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Why does it suck to be a black Jew?
You have to sit at the back of the oven

A wonderful gift for a girl or boy in your life:


haven't seen this at my corner store yet:

Just when I think this place has hit rock bottom, you come up with something worse

[Cursed]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Just when I think this place has hit rock bottom, you come up with something worse

Look, it's not the forum's fault orientals drink jew ear juice. Take it up with them.

[David Rothstein]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Jesus walks into a motel and throws three nails on the counter and says to the manager "Can you put me up for the night?"

[barton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

There was a joke told recently by Italian Prime Minister Sylvio Berlusconi on his birthday:

Berlusconi, who turned 74, jocularly told well wishers a joke about about a Jew that charged another Jew 3,000 euros a day to hide him during the Holocaust. “The Jew says, the question now is whether we should tell him Hitler is dead and the war is over,” Berlusconi recounted as the punchline.

[barton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Why did Hitler kill himself?
The Jews sent him the gas bill!

What's the worst part about raping a dead Jewish five year old?
Hearing the pelvis crack!
What's even worse?
There's six million more to go!

What candy did Hitler hate the most?
Jew Jew beans.....although I heard he enjoyed them 'roasted!'

What's the best thing that ever came out of Auschwitz?
The empty buses!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Jesus walks into a motel and throws three nails on the counter and says to the manager "Can you put me up for the night?"

That was INCREDIBLY hateful! Why do you damned joos always insist on persecuting Christians?

It's behavior like this that brought God's wrath down on you during WW2.

[Gods Hand!]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Why did Hitler kill himself?
The Jews sent him the gas bill!

What candy did Hitler hate the most?
Jew Jew beans.....although I heard he enjoyed them 'roasted!'

How about..
How did Hitler die?
He choked on a Jew Jew bean as he was shocked by the gasbill the jews send him.

Hehe, a well know joke here, but then with a cake known as 'Jew cake'. May God forbid these cakes some day!

Also,
A jew with an erection runs into a wall, what does he break?
His nose

[Devotion]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Also,
A jew with an erection runs into a wall, what does he break?
His nose

You would think the bank tellers would be nice enough to warn him he was about to walk into a wall.

[Mr Jake]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

These jokes are hilarious! I really enjoy reading them.

[Titus Templeton]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

[Gods Hand!]

Re: Holocaust Jokes

Come on people! Keep it up with the jew jokes!

How many holes did the showerheads in Auswitz have?
11, so there's one to much for all fingers

Why do jews have big noses?
'Cause the air is free

A catholic priest and a rabby are walking down the street, on the other side of the street is a young boy. The priest says 'Let's screw him!'. The rabby replied 'Screw him out of what?'