[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

What I find hilarious is the thought of all you keyboard commandos typing with BOTH hands now writing with the left hand is wrong because you are communicating via a sinister method, I.e. Left hand. So how many of you tied that filthy hand behind your back before sitting down to type? If you did not, can I assume that half of your words are inspired by the devil? If so, which ones? So confused...

You certainly are, dear! It is perfectly obvious to even the most limited intellect that there are certain tasks for which one needs both hands.

I'll give you an example. On Sunday we had a potluck lunch after Church. Now when the driver carried the platters of food that my daughter and I had prepared from the car to the Church Hall, he carried each one in both hands. Why? Because he needed to balance the food on the platters - otherwise there would have been partridges all over the place. And have you ever seen the mess made by a dropped lemon meringue pie?

Similarly, when we women and children were eating, we held our forks in our left hands to steady the food on the plate while we cut it (right-handed), before transferring them to our right hands to transfer the food to our mouths. (I cannot speak for all the men, who were in another room.)

When I am stirring a pot of food, I hold the pot handle with my left hand while stirring with my right. God understands this. Why else would He have given us two hands?

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

So it only applies when convenient? Ok

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

And why would he take affront to using something he made? Are babies in the womb guilty when they suck the left thumb? Personally, I think people should stop trying to put words in their gods mouth. Left hand bias stems from lefties being different, and different must be bad. Take into account that lefties tend to question more and have divergent thoughts, it is only natural that superstitious people would attribute it to the devil. Also, typing is not a task that NEEDS two hands, the fact is that it is easier and faster to accomplish with both hands. If God understands this as you say, then he understands using the left hand for any and all things. I myself am perfectly capable of writing with both hands equally well so if I write one letter with the right whilst writing another with the left in an effort to economize time--it is the same as typing with both. Also, it is quite well known that left handed people use the right side of their brain more than righties. So when we write leftie our thoughts are coming from the right hemisphere, (the godly side), whereas righties are dominated by the left. I really do not mean to offend but it just seems a bit ludicrous to judge people for using their left hand when there are real problems in the world. I personally find it hard to accept that a man who gives charity with his left hand is placed in the same boat as one who steals with his right. All being decided by a denomination which owes its rise to death and war. But that is acceptable, right? Never mind the fact that God says non-believers will be judged and punished accordingly by HIM upon death, let's go ahead and break the whole "thou shalt not kill" because they do not agree with our Christian bible that was inspired by the Jewish religion. After all, they are not believers so that gives us the right to put to death one of gods creatures made in his image. And never mind the fact that the Jewish people are still waiting for their messiah....they got all the Old Testament stuff right but dropped the ball when it came to THEIR prophecy! But let's look at that a moment, the shroud of Turin seems to suggest that Jesus himself was a leftie, so I guess he was crucified for more than just OUR sins. And also, let's just disregard what John 8:1-8 has to say. Perhaps Christians are the lost tribe of Dan? I guess that might excuse the 50-100 million deaths attributed to Christian love. I guess only God knows....maybe he will raise up another left handed man, (Ehud) to deliver his truth. Oh wait, does that mean God is guilty of sin? Maybe we need to start lecturing him

[Elmer G. White]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Dear Mr. Thomas, I'll try to catch some thoughts from your stream of consciousness, as follows.

And why would he take affront to using something he made? Are babies in the womb guilty when they suck the left thumb?

God Created many things, some things He Created to be by default evil. It's His choice and I accept that and Fear Him as I should (Ecclesiastes 12:13).

Isaiah 45:7
I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.

As for the babies, yes, they are guilty.

Exodus 20:5
Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me;

Romans 3:10
As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:

Q.E.D. Babies are evil. Only those who have the wits to Repent and Receive Christ have any hope. It is our duty to try to keep babies alive until they're old enough to Repent. Otherwise, they end up in Hell, which is most unfortunate.

Acts 2:38
Then Peter said unto them, Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

...also, let's just disregard what John 8:1-8 has to say.

I think that you're trying sarcasm here, but let us see a verse of that Chapter, a verse just after the one you cited but conveniently decided to disregard.

John 8:11
She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.

Sin no more! You're forgiven provided you cease to sin. Fortunately, we have accepted Christ and we cannot sin any more. We have become pure!

1 John 3:9
Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.

How wonderful, and this is also available to people following all the false religions you mentioned, as well as to the babies if they survive long enough to Repent etc. Praise Jesus!

I guess that might excuse the 50-100 million deaths attributed to Christian love. I guess only God knows....maybe he will raise up another left handed man, (Ehud) to deliver his truth. Oh wait, does that mean God is guilty of sin? Maybe we need to start lecturing him

Of course God is not guilty of sin. He kills when it is necessary to His master plan. I can tell you that 100 million is going to be peanuts very soon, as God is going to destroy one third of all human beings in one strike preceded and followed by billions of other deaths.

Revelation 9:16-18
And the number of the army of the horsemen were two hundred thousand thousand: and I heard the number of them. And thus I saw the horses in the vision, and them that sat on them, having breastplates of fire, and of jacinth, and brimstone: and the heads of the horses were as the heads of lions; and out of their mouths issued fire and smoke and brimstone. By these three was the third part of men killed, by the fire, and by the smoke, and by the brimstone, which issued out of their mouths.

Before that takes place (very soon, Jesus has promised us so; Revelation 22:20), God has destroyed almost all sealife, forests, grass including grains, poisoned rivers and other freshwater sources. He does this to make His message clear, to give those who oppose Him a powerful sign that He means business.

Yes, Babies are to blame. Everyone not a True Christian™ is to blame but almost anyone* can become a True Christian™ and be Saved from all that nuisance.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

*Matthew 12:31 tells us about those who are not eligible.

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Pretty sure it was men who did all that killing. I agree actually, God wants us dead he would do it. He certainly would not want his followers committing sin by murder. And is it not funny that God is a jealous God and we are made in his image but are told not to covet?

[Elmer G. White]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Pretty sure it was men who did all that killing. I agree actually, God wants us dead he would do it. He certainly would not want his followers committing sin by murder. And is it not funny that God is a jealous God and we are made in his image but are told not to covet?

I see great promise in you. Nor do I find it funny that God it a jealous God. Many sinners whine that they would not want to worship a God that is by human standards capable of committing terrible atrocities and hold grudge for at least ten generations:

Deuteronomy 23:2
A bastard shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD; even to his tenth generation shall he not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

Personally, I think that a Fearsome God is exactly the kind of God that we'd better worship to avoid the unpleasantries of Eternal Torture!

Matthew 8:12
But the children of the kingdom shall be cast out into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnasing of teeth.

It is OK to covet righteousness and the gift to prophecy.

1 Corinthians 12:3
But covet earnestly the best gifts: and yet shew I unto you a more excellent way.


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

As I said before, it is a bit hard to accept men's translations of passages when Jesus himself spoke in parables to Gentiles. Does it make sense that gods chosen people are Jewish, yet the Jewish religion does not recognize Jesus and are indeed still waiting for their prophecies to be fulfilled? Does this mean gods chosen will go to hell? And speaking of Jews and the Old Testament, does this mean that everyone who lived before either Jews or Jesus was condemned to hell? The fact is that Christianity is a relatively new religion and borrows heavily from the pagans they killed. Also, revelations was about the demise of the Roman Empire and to show the cyclical nature of all things. Take for example that 666 is the number of the beast yet in Jewish gematria which makes no distinction between letters and numbers) six hundred and sixty six literally means Nero Caesar. And only the learned (Jewish) could "understand and calculate the number of the beast, for the number, (name) is that of a man. In earlier texts this number was 616 which happens to be the same name in Latin. But this seems to have been brushed aside after Rome converted from their heathen ways. The fact is that man changes everything to suit them, (including scripture) and the only reason Christianity is popular today is because greedy, materialistic men swept over the earth killing, raping, and pillaging. History is written by the victors

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Dear Jonathan Thomas,

You have received an infraction at The Landover Baptist Church Forum.

Reason: Using Wall of Text to Display Angry, Irrational Rant Indicative of Insanity
-------
Hi and welcome to our friendly forums! I know you're just as happy as I am to talk about Jesus and all He's done for you lately, but we do have a few ground rules here. While participating on our forums, you are expected to be respectful to your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Respect includes, but is not limited to, refraining from debate, mockery, ridicule, or any commentary intended to pull people away from their faith.

While at Landover Baptist Forums, please keep in mind that you are making a public contribution to the fact that the Bible is the Infallible Word of God, and Jesus Christ is the Final Authority in all things related to the faith and morals. Should you care to share your personal opinion, kindly back it up with the Holy Bible, Chapter and Verse, in which the LORD says it first. Please read THIS thread before posting any more foolishness. Finally, your rights can be found HERE.

Wow....just wow..... talk about proving my point. People can say people who use their left hand will go to hell and that they will be happy to see those sinners burn forever, yet respectful debate is threatened with expulsions? I was merely having an enjoyable discussion with Elmer. If people can't talk about their differing viewpoints, we are cursed to keep killing one another.

I must point out though that the lady who sent this to me would not have had any right to do so in the early years of the church. Timothy 2:12

As you can see, I do reference scripture as you would have seen while reading. But maybe Timothy 2:12 does not apply to the sender? Perhaps she knows better than Jesus

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

So it only applies when convenient? Ok

That is not what I said. But I have a family to feed, so I will leave you to Brother Professor Dr White, a true gentleman of endless patience.

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Joanna,

Glad to see you follow 1 Corinthians 14:34-35

[James Hutchins]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

What I find hilarious is the thought of all you keyboard commandos typing with BOTH hands now writing with the left hand is wrong because you are communicating via a sinister method, I.e. Left hand. So how many of you tied that filthy hand behind your back before sitting down to type? If you did not, can I assume that half of your words are inspired by the devil? If so, which ones? So confused...

I do not type with my left hand. God does not want it.



Why do you hate Him? Is it because you masturbate all the time? During many weekend retreats there are only men present and people with intelligent things to say can do so freely without worrying if a woman will get vapors, there has been discussion about this problem. Many men, prior to finding Jesus have been tormented with self-Homoerotic manifestations. That is man on many queer behavior with only one man is present. We discovered it is what you people call masturbation.

[Basilissa]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

As I said before, it is a bit hard to accept men's translations of passages when Jesus himself spoke in parables to gentiles.

Dear, please do find me a single Bible passage where Jesus talks to the Gentiles. When you are searching, please keep in mind the following verses:

Matthew 10:5-6
5 These twelve Jesus sent forth, and commanded them, saying, Go not into the way of the Gentiles, and into any city of the Samaritans enter ye not:
6 But go rather to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.

Jesus Himself and His disciples when He was alive, were preaching exclusively to Jews. It is only after the Jews killed Him, that they stopped being the Chosen Nation and the focus was moved to gentiles.

Does it make sense that gods chosen people are Jewish, yet the Jewish religion does not recognize Jesus and are indeed still waiting for their prophecies to be fulfilled? Does this mean gods chosen will go to hell?

Yes. They made the decision to disregard Jesus, so all but 144,000 Jews will go to Hell:

Revelation 7:4 And I heard the number of them which were sealed: and there were sealed an hundred and forty and four thousand of all the tribes of the children of Israel.

That's really not much comparing with the countless gentile Christians who will be spared:

Revelation 7:9 After this I beheld, and, lo, a great multitude, which no man could number, of all nations, and kindreds, and people, and tongues, stood before the throne, and before the Lamb, clothed with white robes, and palms in their hands;

And speaking of Jews and the Old Testament, does this mean that everyone who lived before either Jews or Jesus was condemned to hell?

Yes. Those who lived in the Americas before 1492, or in any other place on earth before Christians missionaries got there, are also condemned. The same goes for babies who died before being able to accept Jesus as their Savior:

John 3:18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

The fact is that man changes everything to suit them, (including scripture) and the only reason Christianity is popular today is because greedy, materialistic men swept over the earth killing, raping, and pillaging. History is written by the victors

Indeed, and you have to admit that Christianity is such a perfect justification for all of the events of genocide and oppression. Praise The Lord for giving us Christians the permission to rob, enslave, and kill the Indians, for example!

Joanna,

Glad to see you follow 1 Corinthians 14:34-35

Please note this is not a church but just an internet forum, dear.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

Wow....just wow..... talk about proving my point. People can say people who use their left hand will go to hell and that they will be happy to see those sinners burn forever, yet respectful debate is threatened with expulsions? I was merely having an enjoyable discussion with Elmer. If people can't talk about their differing viewpoints, we are cursed to keep killing one another.

Are you endorsing censorship of the Holy Bible? Is it your position that a church group should not read, believe, and advocate for the faith and morals as divinely revealed through the Holy Word of God?

I must point out though that the lady who sent this to me would not have had any right to do so in the early years of the church. Timothy 2:12

You are referring to 1 Timothy 2:12 (there exist two letters to Timothy in the New, non-Jew Testament):

But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
1 Timothy 2:12

Please explain what you think I "taught" you, and what authority you think you had that I usurped.

[Jonathan Thomas]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

The Kingdom of God is inside/within you (and all about you), not in buildings/mansions of wood and stone. (When I am gone) Split a piece of wood and I am there, lift the/a stone and you will find me."

[Basilissa]

Re: STOP being Left-handed!!!

The Kingdom of God is inside/within you (and all about you), not in buildings/mansions of wood and stone. (When I am gone) Split a piece of wood and I am there, lift the/a stone and you will find me."

You really think that reading Gnostic apocrypha is the correct path to Heaven?