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Review: 'Hansel and Gretel great cinema with a positive message of witch killing.
Why has Hollywood waited so long to release this gem to the public? Some say it was to cash in on Jeremy Renner's rising fame. Personally, I think it was to tweak the establishment's nose at this glaring snub for best picture Oscar.
The world Hansel and Gretel occupy is that of a medieval time, but at the same time they incorporate modern weapons, like pump action shotguns and machine guns. A sort of renaissance fair steam punk.
The animators of this movie were clearly guided by God's own hand when they made this green screen masterpiece. My only complaint with the special effects is that the actors' clothing was clearly not computer generated.
The action sequences involving high wire kung fu are fast paced, yet fresh and original. They do involve some mild violence, but after watching the Passion of the Christ 145 times, it seems a bit tame.
Hansel and Gretal's quest? Killing witches. The pair are celebrity witch hunters, much like our own beloved Pastor. They travel the world hunting witches and they are thanked for it! Unlike a certain movie reviewer who gets sued over baiting bear traps with Oreos outside of known Wiccan meeting places.
Interspersed with the great action sequences is the heart of this movie, its message
Exodus 22:18 Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.
Hansel is also the world's first diabetic. His punishment from God for being a glutton and eating too much candy as a child. He has since repented and lives thanks to God's grace and insulin injections.
The witches are easy to spot in the movie as they are in real life. They are powder white skinned and wear a lot of black like goths, punks, emos and other assorted strange outcasts of society.
Writer/director Tommy Wirkola delivers poignant and frightening dialog by slowing down Famke Janssen's voice so you know how evil she is with such lines as, "I'm not... going to... kill you..., yet. That...would...be...too...easy."
Brothers and sisters, this is the greatest True Christian™ cinema experience since Battleship.
So take the family and go see this movie today!
The world Hansel and Gretel occupy is that of a medieval time, but at the same time they incorporate modern weapons, like pump action shotguns and machine guns. A sort of renaissance fair steam punk.
The animators of this movie were clearly guided by God's own hand when they made this green screen masterpiece. My only complaint with the special effects is that the actors' clothing was clearly not computer generated.
The action sequences involving high wire kung fu are fast paced, yet fresh and original. They do involve some mild violence, but after watching the Passion of the Christ 145 times, it seems a bit tame.
Hansel and Gretal's quest? Killing witches. The pair are celebrity witch hunters, much like our own beloved Pastor. They travel the world hunting witches and they are thanked for it! Unlike a certain movie reviewer who gets sued over baiting bear traps with Oreos outside of known Wiccan meeting places.
Interspersed with the great action sequences is the heart of this movie, its message
Exodus 22:18 Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live.
Hansel is also the world's first diabetic. His punishment from God for being a glutton and eating too much candy as a child. He has since repented and lives thanks to God's grace and insulin injections.
The witches are easy to spot in the movie as they are in real life. They are powder white skinned and wear a lot of black like goths, punks, emos and other assorted strange outcasts of society.
Writer/director Tommy Wirkola delivers poignant and frightening dialog by slowing down Famke Janssen's voice so you know how evil she is with such lines as, "I'm not... going to... kill you..., yet. That...would...be...too...easy."
Brothers and sisters, this is the greatest True Christian™ cinema experience since Battleship.
So take the family and go see this movie today!
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