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  • Sista Lateefah
    Honorary White Woman.
    True Christian™
    • Mar 2007
    • 522

    #46
    Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

    Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
    Let's see what God's Word has to say about fellatio:

    his:
    " Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. "(Song of Solomon 2:3)
    That just say she had liked a apple or orange or somethin' he had gave her. It do not say nothin' about the perversions you is talkin' about!
    hers: " Awake, O north wind, and come, wind of the south; make my garden breathe out fragrance, let its spices be wafted abroad. May my beloved come into his garden and eat its choice fruits! " (Song of Solomon 4:16)
    And she just makin' him some dinner to repay him fo' that apple he had gave her! You just readin' into this whatcho perverted mind want to read into it. You needta get Saved© so the LORD can lift yo mind outta the gutter!
    sigpic
    "He went on CNN and he laughed at us, and he said, 'They'll never get me because Allah will protect me. Allah will protect me.' Well, you know what? I knew that my God was bigger than his. I knew that my God was a real God and his was an idol." - Lt. General William G. Boykin

    Comment

    • Old Iron Crotch
      SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
      • May 2007
      • 3056

      #47
      Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

      Originally posted by Sista Lateefah View Post
      That just say she had liked a apple or orange or somethin' he had gave her. It do not say nothin' about the perversions you is talkin' about!
      And she just makin' him some dinner to repay him fo' that apple he had gave her! You just readin' into this whatcho perverted mind want to read into it. You needta get Saved© so the LORD can lift yo mind outta the gutter!
      Actaully, Lateefah, Song of Solomon IS an erotic poem.
      Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

      Comment

      • Brother V
        True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2006
        • 3481

        #48
        Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

        Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
        Let's see what God's Word has to say about fellatio:

        his:
        " Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste. "(Song of Solomon 2:3)

        hers: " Awake, O north wind, and come, wind of the south; make my garden breathe out fragrance, let its spices be wafted abroad. May my beloved come into his garden and eat its choice fruits! " (Song of Solomon 4:16)
        Are you quite sure that it means fellatio?

        Many people consider the SoS to be an allegory of God's love for His children. Regardless of that; have you read any of the rest of the story, like ... um... maybe 2 verses below 2:3...

        Song of Solomon 2:5 Stay me with flagons, comfort me with apples: for I am sick of love.

        According to your definition, comfort me with apples means comfort me with blowjobs.

        Maybe SoS is an allegory, but, your looking for permission to suck dick, it doesn't provide.

        YIC
        V
        Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

        Comment

        • Betty Lambskin
          Apple Sucker
          Forum Member
          • Jun 2007
          • 144

          #49
          Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

          Originally posted by Brother V View Post
          According to your definition, comfort me with apples means comfort me with blowjobs.

          Maybe SoS is an allegory, but, your looking for permission to suck (expletive deleted), it doesn't provide.

          YIC
          V

          In all my years I have never heard a senior pastor speaking of sucking "ducks"! I will pray that you learn to use proper terminology. Meanwhile, will continue to waft my spices, and nibble my husband's apples, as if they were Christ himself!

          Comment

          • Brother V
            True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2006
            • 3481

            #50
            Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

            Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
            In all my years I have never heard a senior pastor speaking of sucking "ducks"! I will pray that you learn to use proper terminology. Meanwhile, will continue to waft my spices, and nibble my husband's apples, as if they were Christ himself!
            So you teach that oral sex is acceptable, and you've never heard that term. I'm really amazed.

            More amazed than I am that a person could come to the conclusion that Song of Solomon promotes oral sex.

            I was pondering over this earlier, and I thought, how funny it was that you don't use the real Bible (KJV1611) but have used several different perversions of the Lords Holy Word, in order to justify your sick desires.

            It also struck me as odd, that I've never heard anyone who only uses the KJV1611 bible try to justify oral sex with the bible.

            Coincidence?

            YIC
            V
            Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

            Comment

            • Daisy Mae Johnson
              The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
              Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
              aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 15708

              #51
              Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

              Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
              Meanwhile, will continue to waft my spices, and nibble my husband's apples!
              PLEASE keep your perversions off this board.

              I am a woman of CHRIST and do not wish to be assualted with your sex talk everytime I open a post by you.

              P/S: Does your husband point at his apples and tell you they will not suck themselves?

              DEEPLY Offended, Sister Thumper
              Last edited by Daisy Mae Johnson; 06-13-2007, 08:15 PM.
              sigpic

              Tweet me Here
              My GODLY Bio Here

              Comment

              • Brother V
                True Christian™ Nitric Oxide
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 3481

                #52
                Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
                I am a new to this site, and for some strange reason it labels me "under investigation" I have been saved for 23 years. How can I fix this? And why do you label people like this?
                Congratulations, you are no longer listed as Unsaved Trash.

                YIC
                v
                Judges 9:21 And Jotham ran away, and fled, and went to Beer, and dwelt there, for fear of Abimelech his brother.

                Comment

                • Betty Lambskin
                  Apple Sucker
                  Forum Member
                  • Jun 2007
                  • 144

                  #53
                  Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                  Originally posted by Brother V View Post

                  It also struck me as odd, that I've never heard anyone who only uses the KJV1611 bible try to justify oral sex with the bible.

                  Coincidence?

                  YIC
                  V
                  I have NEVER justified oral sex with the Bible. This act is only acceptable between a heterosexual man and woman.

                  I will live with my new demeaning subheading. Are you people bent on perversion?

                  Comment

                  • Talitha
                    Deaconess
                    Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2026
                    • 15118

                    #54
                    Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                    Originally posted by Brother V View Post
                    Congratulations, you are no longer listed as Unsaved Trash.
                    YIC
                    v
                    Praise!! Pastor V

                    You show such compassion.

                    I hope you're not going soft on us?

                    Sister Talitha

                    Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


                    HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
                    being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



                    Comment

                    • Rachael Van Helsing
                      HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 5131

                      #55
                      Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                      Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                      P/S: Does your husband point at his apples and tell you they will not suck themselves?

                      DEEPLY Offended, Sister Thumper


                      Actually, I agree with you guys (eek). This one seems unusually fixated on sexual acts, even more than....er....some people!

                      BL, surely there's a 'kinky housewives' forum somewhere for that kinda thing? Or, what about talking about such things with your girlfriends? You won't get much of a receptive audience here, I'm afraid.

                      You, like all other *cough* tolerant xtians <insert sarcasm> probably wouldn't take advice from an 'evil heathen' <insert sarcasm> like myself, but, it's just a helpful hint. Ignore it if you will, and see what happens.
                      sigpic
                      Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                      Comment

                      • Virginia Day Templeton
                        Christ's Battle Axe
                         
                        • Dec 2006
                        • 2827

                        #56
                        Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                        Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
                        Well first of all, it is not Foreskin, but lamb skin, as in the blessed lamb of God. And actually Lambskin is also the name of my Cockatoo, so I thought it was cute.
                        Sister (Brother?), the Bible does not mention or give names to mankind's naughty parts. Do you really think God would approve of your coming up with cute labels like "Lambskin" for your tallywhacker?
                        sigpic

                        Comment

                        • Goatski
                          Forum Member
                          Forum Member
                          • Apr 2007
                          • 123

                          #57
                          Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                          Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
                          I have NEVER justified oral sex with the Bible. This act is only acceptable between a heterosexual man and woman.

                          I will live with my new demeaning subheading. Are you people bent on perversion?
                          Ma'am, oral sex has no place in the chaste household. Only through the connection of the lingam and yoni can the couple unite into one terribly divine power and work in the forge of the ninth sphere. Oral sex is purely for pleasure, bestial in nature, and leads to even more deprived forms of infrasexuality. One must NEVER spill the cup of Hermes, never reach the abonimable orgasm, never spill the sacred wine - EVER!!!

                          1 John 3:
                          [9] Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.
                          [10] In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.


                          People who orgasm are of the devil so don't go thinking wild sweaty animal thrusting is OK.

                          Comment

                          • Mrs. Mary Whitford
                            Ladies of Landover Senior VP
                            One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
                            Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
                            True Christian™
                            • Dec 2006
                            • 12414

                            #58
                            Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                            Originally posted by Bloody Lambskin View Post
                            1 Corinthians 7:5 Do not deprive each other, except perhaps by mutual consent for a time, to be free for prayer, but then return to one another, so that Satan may not tempt you through your lack of self-control.

                            The Bible says that the husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. Would Christ say to the Chrurch, I'm going to force you to be pregnant even though we can't afford another child? No, out of loving concern Jesus would take precautions before penetrating the congregation. To refrain altogether could lead to adultery!


                            Sounds like your prudish discomfort may have to do with brainwashing from your papist days.
                            First, let's quote the real Bible instead.

                            1 Corinthians 7:5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

                            Now that's out of the way, even though my marital bed is none of your concern, I will say my husband and I come together enough for both our tastes and for one purpose, to plant his seed in my womb so we may bring forth more little Christians.
                            And to answer your question, "Would Christ say to the Chrurch [sic], I'm going to force you to be pregnant even though we can't afford another child?" Yes, of course He would! Again, here is the relevant scripture...

                            1 Timothy 2:15 Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.

                            Saved in childbearing! It doesn't get any more clear than that!
                            Posted via Prayer

                            1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
                            Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

                            Blogging for CHRIST!
                            Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
                            All a-Twitter for Salvation!
                            Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
                            On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
                            My Ladies of Landover profile!

                            Comment

                            • Pastor Ezekiel
                              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                               
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 78556

                              #59
                              Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                              Originally posted by Goetien View Post
                              Ma'am, oral sex has no place in the chaste household. Only through the connection of the lingam and yoni can the couple unite into one terribly divine power and work in the forge of the ninth sphere. Oral sex is purely for pleasure, bestial in nature, and leads to even more deprived forms of infrasexuality. One must NEVER spill the cup of Hermes, never reach the abonimable orgasm, never spill the sacred wine - EVER!!!

                              1 John 3:
                              [9] Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.
                              [10] In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.


                              People who orgasm are of the devil so don't go thinking wild sweaty animal thrusting is OK.
                              Is that how you got vasalcongestion? I thought you gothfags loved to have circlejerk parties every chance you got...
                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

                              • Betty Lambskin
                                Apple Sucker
                                Forum Member
                                • Jun 2007
                                • 144

                                #60
                                Re: I am NOT UNSAVED TRASH ! please explain

                                Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                                Is that how you got vasalcongestion? I thought you gothfags loved to have circlejerk parties every chance you got...
                                How is that I am persecuted for upholding the wholesome, earth-baked goodness about marital sexuality practiced in 95% of congregations today, I backed it up on the Bible (again last night!) and yet Pastor Zeke deems it appropriate to talk about circle-"joking" ?

                                Comment

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