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My Irish tart recipe - It's bloody good!
Hello darlings 
,
Though evident in the past while since I joined, we have our obvious differences, if there is one thing that's universal, we all cannot resist home baking, especially homemade, Gale-certified strawberry tart!
Let me share my secret
Gale Wendy-Force Hoaring's Delicious Homemade Irish Strawberry Tart
1 and a quarter cup of AP flour - the first and foremost base to deflower this tart!
4 tbs. of sweet, sweet sugar
1/2 tsp of straight up saltiness
6 sticks of warm, but firm butter
2 tb. of lard, usually Baptist ladies have some to spare
a dash of cinnamon and all-spic
2 pints of strawberries hulled and heaved
1/3 petroleum jelly to give it a little kick
For the sweet cream
5 large egg yolks, unfertilized
2/4 cups of more sugar, baby!
1 1/2 cup of hot milk
A bit of starch and slash of Cognac, rum, and vodka in that order
Squirt in a tablespoon of Irish cream and freshly churned butter
1. Get the oven nice and hot, 375 F should do. Get your free 4 inch springform tart pan and combine the flour, salt and sugar....and mix and mix and get it all nice and mingled.
2. Check for a pulse because we are going to pulsate that butter and shortening. And churn, and churn and add lots of water....lots of iced water. You want to hear about dark things at nice, you don't do it over a Bloody Caesar at brunch. Good? Now set it aside to chill out after all that pulsing.
3. Now roll out the dough and don't over stretch it! It should be nice and stiff after being in the fridge. Bake for 20 minutes until its browner than the Mexican pool boy.
4. Now, for the creamy finish. Get the sugar to sweeten up those eggs and beat it! Get it nice and thick and starch it up. Mix it nice and low and pour in your hot milk. It might look curdled but this is okay! It's normal. Just beat it with vigor, shake it all up. It will make a nice pudding. To loosen it up, slosh in all that booze. Get the pool boy to squeeze the custard out and pour into your tart crust.
5. Glaze it with your spicy jelly, and serve at your next bake sale!
Good eh? Try it now. It's bloody good tart!
,Though evident in the past while since I joined, we have our obvious differences, if there is one thing that's universal, we all cannot resist home baking, especially homemade, Gale-certified strawberry tart!
Let me share my secret
Gale Wendy-Force Hoaring's Delicious Homemade Irish Strawberry Tart
1 and a quarter cup of AP flour - the first and foremost base to deflower this tart!
4 tbs. of sweet, sweet sugar
1/2 tsp of straight up saltiness
6 sticks of warm, but firm butter
2 tb. of lard, usually Baptist ladies have some to spare
a dash of cinnamon and all-spic
2 pints of strawberries hulled and heaved
1/3 petroleum jelly to give it a little kick
For the sweet cream
5 large egg yolks, unfertilized
2/4 cups of more sugar, baby!
1 1/2 cup of hot milk
A bit of starch and slash of Cognac, rum, and vodka in that order
Squirt in a tablespoon of Irish cream and freshly churned butter
1. Get the oven nice and hot, 375 F should do. Get your free 4 inch springform tart pan and combine the flour, salt and sugar....and mix and mix and get it all nice and mingled.
2. Check for a pulse because we are going to pulsate that butter and shortening. And churn, and churn and add lots of water....lots of iced water. You want to hear about dark things at nice, you don't do it over a Bloody Caesar at brunch. Good? Now set it aside to chill out after all that pulsing.
3. Now roll out the dough and don't over stretch it! It should be nice and stiff after being in the fridge. Bake for 20 minutes until its browner than the Mexican pool boy.
4. Now, for the creamy finish. Get the sugar to sweeten up those eggs and beat it! Get it nice and thick and starch it up. Mix it nice and low and pour in your hot milk. It might look curdled but this is okay! It's normal. Just beat it with vigor, shake it all up. It will make a nice pudding. To loosen it up, slosh in all that booze. Get the pool boy to squeeze the custard out and pour into your tart crust.
5. Glaze it with your spicy jelly, and serve at your next bake sale!
Good eh? Try it now. It's bloody good tart!
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