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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 08-15-2021, 11:51 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blanche_Locke View Post
Ah yes, the susspression of freedom of speech hard at work so I see...
This is not a government entity. They owe you nothing.

Learn how stuff works before complaining, k?


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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 08-16-2021, 02:13 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blanche_Locke View Post
Ah yes, the susspression of freedom of speech hard at work so I see.clap. clap. clap.
You strike me as rather extremist, that's all. Not necessarily criticizing, just checking things out. I'd be happy to do a little debating with y'all later, but in the meantime I have some work to get done.
You spelled "suppression" wrong, so the haughty tone that you are reaching for rings a bit hollow, my dear. (That was a patronizing tone, in case you missed it.)


As for your observation that we are an extremist lot, well, our position is in defense of the Bible as the one and only true word of the one and only true God. If you take the time to read the Bible, you will find that many of its positions seem rather extreme in relation to modern sensibilities.


And our pastor will be along sooner or later to clarify the Landover Baptist position on debating. (Hint: We don't.)


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

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Jesus Re: False Religions And Cults - 08-16-2021, 02:52 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blanche_Locke View Post
Ah yes, the susspression of freedom of speech hard at work so I see.clap. clap. clap.
You strike me as rather extremist, that's all. Not necessarily criticizing, just checking things out. I'd be happy to do a little debating with y'all later, but in the meantime I have some work to get done.
Dear Miss Blanche: We are truly happy that you have found , within the very tangled branches of the vast interwebs galaxy. Before we go much further, I wonder if I might trouble you, to post an introductory message — over at our cordial Introduction Forum. We like our newcomers to post a few words about themselves, so that we can become acquainted. The link to that friendly forum is here:

https://www.landoverbaptist.net/forumdisplay.php?f=16

Whilst there, kindly pay close attention to our very simple requests, which are posted at the top of the page; however, I am more than happy to include them here, for your added benefit:

The introduction forum Attention Unsaved Trash: This the ONLY subforum you can start threads in. Here is where you introduce yourself. Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

We do look forward to getting to know you, Dear -- here, at .




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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 08-16-2021, 04:31 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blanche_Locke View Post
You strike me as rather extremist,
Yes, we do believe that the Holy Bible is the inerrant Word of God, and in today's secular society it does make us extremists.

Thank you for appreciating our dedication to our Lord.
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 08-17-2021, 01:39 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blanche_Locke View Post
freedom of speech
There are two aspects to freedom. One, the lesser of the two, is what the law allows. Or insists on as the case may be. For example you can't drive around at 300MPH even if you just wasted several million on a car able to do that. (Unless you're in Germany or Australia but even then not on all roads.) The law insists on it; perhaps I can say I think that's a stupid law and it should be changed but if I start making speeches telling people to poison everyone that would be different. At some point freedom of speech becomes incitement to poison. Written ideas are treated differently and there is the interesting legal question of whether words printed on a T-shirt——a declaration of war, say——which you wear and get someone to photograph you wearing it, then circulate the photograph, constitutes——in this case——a declaration of war or not? The same applies to any other category of free speech.

The other, more important, aspect is what happens after you've made your perfectly legal announcement? Many false religions and cults think you should suffer consequences for your opinion. They may turf you out from your home, isolate you socially and here you could think "just move somewhere else" but if you've also lost your job and nobody will employ you moving states or continents gets tricky. Some cults think they should chop your head off. They don't care what the law is. And that's why this is the more important of the two. If expressing your opinion leads to certain ruin, that's not freedom of speech, legal diktat notwithstanding.

The Bible explains what God's opinion is. He made the whole universe, quark by quark, knows the location of each one, knows how all-pervasive sin can be once uncorked [thank you, Eve!] and the need for Salvation. Throughout the centuries He's explained this, worked miracles, given commandments, smitten with boils and instant leprosy, killed false priests with jets of flame and finally having Jesus killed for no reason except because He loves us so much. Generally what God was building was mocked from its very foundation.
Acts 4:11-13 This is the stone which was set at nought of you builders, which is become the head of the corner. Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved. Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, that they had been with Jesus.
Here too a subtle distinction is drawn. They were not ignorant BECAUSE they had been with Jesus. They were ignorant AND they had been with Jesus. Cults may say they follow The Bible when, if you read it, they very much don't. They are free to say that in law but God knows their error and one day someone could take them at their word, actually read The Bible and implement its freedoms directly, the only real freedom, freedom from sin.

Which would you prefer?
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 03-03-2023, 08:56 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
Please post any new false religions you run across on this thread, so that they can be added to the register.

Amish
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Worship: Hard work, mules, horses, and Satan.
Trivia Fact: The Amish think that they are saved through hard work and eschewing God's gifts of electricity and modern technology. If God didn't want us to have electricity, He wouldn't have made lightning out of it, and He certainly wouldn't have told Thomas Edison how to make electricity by rubbing two magnets together.

Asatru (Asstrue - an obvious reference to the copious amount of anal sex in their rituals)
Submitted by: Pastor Nerue Gargalo, JustAGuy
worship: The Mighty Thor, a character created by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby in 1962. They also worship the later characters, Thor's evil half-brother Loki, Heimdal, Baldur, Sif, and Odin. But most important is the so-called "All-Father", Satan himself.

Atheists/agnostics
Submitted by: the
worship: Satan and believe in the religion of Evolution and Science

Australian Abrollers
Submitted by: Pastor Nerue Gargalo
worship: Bunyips -- which are demons in the form of a giant marsupial badger, and Satan

Bahai (Be high)
Submitted by: FUNdaMENTAL
Definition: Basically the same thing as the Unitarians, except they claim GOD told them to believe anything they want to.
Worship: Some guy named Bahulla Balooga, and Satan

Being f***ing decent to others despite our differences. (BFDtodod)
Submitted by: VGrid101
worship: Satan

Buddhists (boodists)
Submitted by: Pastor Nereu Gargalo
worship: an obese naked Chinaman, and Satan

Cargo Cults
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
worship: Coke bottles, banana crates, and Satan

Chinese Universists
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Beliefs: A mess of ying/yang cosmology, taoist and boodhist nonsense.
Worship: Household gods, dead relatives, and Satan.

Deism
Submitted By: The Enlightenments
Worship: The "dual nature" of Satan.
Trivia Fact: This "religion" was invented by Thomas Jefferson solely as a ploy to keep references to Jesus out of the wicked U.S. Constitution.

Daoism/Taoism
Submitted by: SifuPhil, with additional information provided by Petal, Tim Tungtalker, and Glendora Christianson.
Definition: A pack of strung-out junkies perfoming Tai Chi, drinking Chai Tea, smoking pot, drinking beer, sleeping with every woman in town, drinking rum, and shoving bananas in various orafices. They claim to achieve everything by doing nothing and they believe in Ying Yan Yuck Yoo, the circle, half black, half white, half witted.
Worship: Nothing, everything, nature, and Satan.

Discordianism (Disco Accordionists)
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
Definition: Wannabe atheists who pray to a Greek goddess named Eric and think that saying fwords while stroking their penile glands is the way to salvation.
Worship: Eric, the number 23, and Satan.

Druidism (Drooish)
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: Bunch of sad English gits dress up in the local drama groups' plastic chainmail, then run around the countryside waving cardboard swords at each other.
Worship: Stonehenge, Satan.

Eastern Orthodox Church
Submitted by: Phatcatlick
worship: Icons (paintings), dead bodies, fingers, toenails, incense and satan

Environmentalists (Tree-Huggers)
Submitted by: Patrick O'Kelley
worship: a minor demon named 'Gaia', spotted owls, snail darters, and Satan.

Episcapalians (Joe Piscapalians)
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: the King of England, and Satan.

Free masons jars
Submitted by: TemplarPHI
Definition: An ancient society of old men who think they can unravel the secrets of the universe by drinking liquor and playing poker for two hours every Wednesday night and who don't realize how stupid they look in robes.
Worship: Archways, elevators, the letter 'G', and Satan.

Gnostics
Submitted by: Remy Lebeau
Definition: Animists who dabble in meditation, chanting and astral travel (destination - Hell), in an effort to gain demonhood. Keep potted plants and gravel as pets.
Worship: Satan, and an assortment of minor demons (fairies, gnomes, undines).

Goddess worship (Godless worship)
Submitted by: More Saved Than Thou
Beliefs: Basically, the opposite of whatever the Holy King James Bible teaches. This is particularly true in the area of male-female relations; in addition, since the Bible attaches such importance to eating meat, goddess worshipers tend to be vegans.
Practices: Hating men; channeling through crystals (Satan's cell phones)
Clergy: Homeresses who are bitter about not being men, so they buy all of their clothes at Steven Windsor Big and Tall Men.
What they worship: The goddess (that is, Satan in drag)

Hindus (Hindaloos)
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: thousands of individual Demons, each masquerading as a god, and Satan.

Hitchhikers in the Galaxy
Submitted by: Pastor Isaac Peters
Description: People with no lives who have chanced upon a book and now parrot quotes from that book to explain everything in their dreary existence.
What they worship: The number 42, and Satan.

Hong Feng Shooey
Submitted by: More Saved Than Thou
Description: The ancient Oriental art of arranging your furniture so that Satan can move about more easily.
Clergy: Overpaid homer interior decorators; overpaid "postmodern" (i.e., homer) architects.
What they worship: Qi, which is a Chinese nickname for Satan.

Hottentots (Hot-to-trots)
Submitted by: Pastor Nerue Gargalo
worship: a minor demon named Gay-nab, and Satan

Injuns
Submitted by: Virginia D. Templeton
Definition: Feather-sporting savages, their faces red from shame at having rejected Jesus, who masturbate with the scalps of Christians and scheme to steal our money through their monolithic network of sin-ridden casinos.
Worship: The Great Spirit (AKA Satan), lesser spirits (AKA Satan), and buffalo.

Jainism (Jane-ism)
Submitted by: ayatollah moomintroll
Worships: Satan in a fluffy animal costume.

Jehovy Witnesses
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: Satan (God's name is not Jehova, it is Jealous, see Ex 34:14)

Jews (Joos)
Submitted by: ayatollah moomintroll
Worship: money. And Satan

Juggalo Faith
Submitted by: Jenny D
Definition: Drug addicts who believe that not washing ones hair, wearing clown makeup, drinking cheap soda, and buying officially licensed merchandise makes one a ninja, not years of specialized martial arts training.
Worship: Clowns, Faggo, and Satan -- the ringmaster of the Dark Carnival

Messianic Joodaism
Submitted By: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: Bunch of confused Joos trying to make amends for killing Jesus.
Worship: 'Yeshua of Nazareth' (Joo-speak for Jim Caviezel), and Satan.

Metropolitan Community "Church"
Sumbitted by: More Saved Than Thou
Description: A "church" that preaches have-a-nice-day Unitarianism to homers.
History: Founded by Troy Perry, who was so far out that not even the Pennycoastals wanted him around anymore.
What they worship: Leftist politics, rug-munching, and Satan.

Mithraism (Mythicallism)
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
worship: Mithras, son of Acura Mazda (see Zoroastrians), referred to as 'the Light of the World' by his demonic followers. This 'religion' is an obvious Satanic mockery of Christianity. According to this ridiculous myth, Mithras was born of a virgin, said 'I am the way and the light, and only through me can ye be saved.', went around performing miricles, held a last supper with his followers, and died to save mankind but was resurrected and ascended into Heaven. Some of the religious practices include ritualistic baptism, drinking wine and eating bread to symbolize Mithras' blood and body, holding Sundays sacred, an an annual celebration of Mithras' birth on December 25. This religion was popular among the Roman soldiers that were in charge of suppressing Jewish revolts between 200 BC and 70 AD.

Moonies (Loonies); official members of the Unification (Loonification) Church.
Submitted by: JonFish85
Worship: The sun, the moon, Sun Myung Moon, and Satan.
Trivia facts: Despite their gruesome recruitment methods (eg, threatening to cut off their target's quivering fingers if said target refuses to sign up for Korean 101), many moonies are surprisingly sensitive about being called "moonies", as it offends their delicate moonie sensibilities.

Mormons
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben, LSD Joe
Definition: Rural folks who believe that salvation can be had by marrying all of one's female cousins and wearing goofy underwear.
Trivia fact: Believe that Jesus came back as a gunfighter in the old west.
worship: Nehi grape soda and Satan.

Muslims (mudslims)
Submitted by: the
worship: the Moon, although they are really bowing to Satan, who told them to worship the Moon

New agers
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: Bunch of white, middle-class baby boomers begin calling themselves silly names, e.g., 'John-of-the-Purple-Thunder-Buttocked', and 'Red-Lady-of-the Moon-Menses', in an attempt to give their lives more meaning.
Worship: Crystals, aliens, newspaper horoscopes, Satan.

Palo Mayombe aka Palo Montenegro
Submitted By: Moonflower13
Definition: Bobbing for human bones in a boiling cauldron.
Worship: a pair of bull-dyke demonettes named Nganga and Prenda.

Pentacostals (Pennycoastals)
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: snakes and Satan.

Presbyterians, Lex Lutherans, Baptists (including Landover Baptists), and Methamphetadists
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: think they worship Jesus, but because of their false, non-Baptist doctrines, they are so twisted around that they are really worshipping Satan. (I realize that "false" and "non-Baptist" are redundant, I'm just trying to drive the point home, praise Jesus!)

Puritans
Submitted By: Moonflower13, Brother Dave
Definition: A group of English Heretics who think they are saved by good works and drab clothes.
Worship: corn and Satan.

Quakers
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: oatmeal, and Satan.

Raelians (Ray-Aliens)
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: a group of Demons that pretend to be aliens from "other planets", when everyone knows that there are no other planets, and those lights in the sky are just that -- little lights a few miles up that can fall right to the ground if Jesus sneezes hard enough. See Rev 6:13.

Rastafarians (Pasta-Reefermans)
Submitted by: Friar Waire
worship: Satan -- they are to stoned and lazy to worship anything, but because Jesus said, "He who is not with me is against me", they worship Satan by default.

Reiki Followers
Submitted by: Brother Mike
Description: So called 'energy healing' which teaches satanic Hindu concepts as well as satanic Pagan concepts. The healing is perverted, they 'lay hands' on each other which is just an excuse to practise homersexuality and adultery.
History: Founded by some homersexual Japanese gook.
What they worship: Angels and a new age God which is of course satan and his demon minions in disguise.

Rosacruces
Submitted By: Moonflower13
Definition: Brazilian trash eating psilocybin mushrooms and digging through gravel pits.
Worships: rocks, rock spirits, rock music, and Satan.

Salvation Army
Submitted by: JonFish85
Definition: Elderly panhandlers with a fetish for army uniforms. These degenerates sing and play tambourines for money, usually at the entrances of Godly Corporations™.
Worship: Musty old clothing, musty old people; but both old and new money.

Santeria (Satanism)
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: Bunch of false catholics get honest with themselves and quit pretending to love JESUS.
Practices: Sacrificing chickens, possession by Satan.
Worship: demons masquerading as Catholic saints and Satan.

Satanists
Submitted by: the
Worship: Satan

Scientologists
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: Satan and Elron Hubbard is his prophet.

Seculiar Humanists
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben
worship: themselves, and Satan.

Shinto
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: The Japs, their minds muddled by Confucianism (i.e., Satanism), begin making tiny paper swans out of serviettes (origami) to appease their dead relatives. This is when they are not busy worshipping the Jap royal family (i.e., Satan), or performing ritual dances (i.e., possession by Satan).
Worship: Dead relatives, and Satan.

Sikhism (Sick-ism)
Sumbitted by: More Saved Than Thou
History: A group of demon-possessed people in India weren't sure whether they could outrage Jesus more by becoming hindaloos or mooselimbs, so they picked the worst aspects of both religions.
Beliefs: Their false god commands them to wear turbans, grow scruffy beards, and manage gas stations.
What they worship: Ceremonial daggers and Satan.

Unitarians
Submitted by: Born Again Bob
worship: Satan. This religion represents a unification of every false religion and their followers are allowed to choose their own paths to Satan.

United Church of Christ
Submitted by: Larry Lee
The once-glorious True Christian™ Church of the Pilgrims and Puritans (who can forget "Sinners In The Hands Of An Angry God") has, in our time, so utterly embraced Satan that even the members of the UCC Divine Revelation that their Church's initials stand for 'Unitarians Considering Christ.' Furthermore, these debased hellhounds advocate the ordination of women and even install women as the pastors of congregations that include men. Lastly, I hope you're sitting down this malignant group welcomes gays and lesbians into their worship services and communities. Jesus weeps! Recently, they were in the news because the television networks refused to air their recruitment tape.
Worship: Satan

Vampirism
Submitted By: Moonflower13, Brother Dave
Definition: a sexual perversion in which pleasure and especially sexual pleasure is obtained by the drawing of blood
Worship: bats, blood, gay blood orgies and Satan.

Various agricultural religions of antiquity
Submitted by: Pastor Isaac Peters
Beliefs: To ensure a good harvest, a deity had to be incarnated in human form every year just to be sacrificed. Adherents never quite got around to explaining why all that was necessary; surely an omnipotent God could ensure a good harvest just by saying, "Let there be a good harvest."
What they worshiped: Crops, the seasons, and Satan.

Voodoo
Submitted By: Moonflower13, Brother Dave
Definition: Voodoo combines the worst elements of two other Satan-glorifying religions, Witchcraft and catlickism. Believers are able to call upon demons to turn corpses into zombies under their control.
Worship: toy dolls and Satan.

Wiccans (wickedans) aka Witches
Submitted by: the
worship: Satan

Zoroastrians (Zorro-Astrologists)
Submitted by: Sri Krishna Chapata
worship: a demon named Acura Mazda, and Satan. This religion was created by Satan (HaShatan) solely to mock the religion of the Israelites while under Babylonian captivity, adding insult to injury.
Fixed it for you.
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 03-03-2023, 10:32 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati View Post
Fixed it for you.
Go to Hell.


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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 03-03-2023, 11:42 PM

Quote:
Romeo Rovagnati
Jesuit Insurgency Operative
It seemed a rather minimal change. Fortunately his standing as a 5th columnist is disclosed in the header.

False belief systems cannot advance by legitimate means. As a result, disingenuous methods became necessary, to slyly infiltrate and bring change from within.

.CLARIFICATION.

"Sly."

They think they're infiltrating slyly but it's as transparent as lead crystal. Although like the graphic (a lovely vintage promotional decanter) insofar as transparency is concerned with an obvious message inside, in all other respects these insurgents are unlovely, self-deluded and revolting.

So why not just say what they intend? Because that involves honesty and to prop up their crock that's the last thing they want or need. Or, let's face it, even understand.
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 03-04-2023, 12:00 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
Sorry Miss Lizardon.


I don't need a love potion as there is no person that I am trying to seduce.
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 03-04-2023, 01:55 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati View Post
Sorry Miss Lizardon.


I don't need a love potion as there is no person that I am trying to seduce.
Yes, why seduce when you can simply compel someone with threats of hellfire?


His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

Guns For God and the Economy
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 06-04-2023, 03:09 PM

Various parts of this post should receive an update.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
Asatru (Asstrue - an obvious reference to the copious amount of anal sex in their rituals)
This is actually not a religion but a small fraction of a larger religion called Odinism.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
Cargo Cults
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
worship: Coke bottles, banana crates, and Satan

You forgot to add that they've worshipped Prince Philip and that now they're probably worshipping King Charlie.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
catlicks (catlicks)
Submitted by: the
worship: Satan and Mary

Please, don't be silly. Catholics do not worship Mary and Satan.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Chinese Universists
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Beliefs: A mess of ying/yang cosmology, taoist and boodhist nonsense.
Worship: Household gods, dead relatives, and Satan.

What kind of religion is called "Chinese University"? Does that mean that the Confucius Institute is a cult?

By the way, the only thing closer to that description is the Chinese Folk Religion, also called Shenism.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Eastern Orthodox Church
Submitted by: Phatcatlick
worship: Icons (paintings), dead bodies, fingers, toenails, incense and satan

They also hate Catholics.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Hitchhikers in the Galaxy
Submitted by: Pastor Isaac Peters
Description: People with no lives who have chanced upon a book and now parrot quotes from that book to explain everything in their dreary existence.
What they worship: The number 42, and Satan.
Wait, since when the Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy is a religious cult? Does that means that people who read Harry Pothead, Lord of the Rings and Chtulhu are also in a cult?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Injuns
Submitted by: Virginia D. Templeton
Definition: Feather-sporting savages, their faces red from shame at having rejected Jesus, who masturbate with the scalps of Christians and scheme to steal our money through their monolithic network of sin-ridden casinos.
That only happened in your racist revisionist history.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Mormons
Submitted by: Pastor Billy-Reuben, LSD Joe
Definition: Rural folks who believe that salvation can be had by marrying all of one's female cousins and wearing goofy underwear.
Trivia fact: Believe that Jesus came back as a gunfighter in the old west.
worship: Nehi grape soda and Satan.



You believe the same, don't you?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Santeria (Satanism)
Submitted by: Mrs. Rogers
Definition: Bunch of cathylicks get honest with themselves and quit pretending to love JESUS.
Practices: Sacrificing chickens, possession by Satan.
Worship: Dead cathylicks and Satan.



Wrong description. Santeros were never Catholics to being with. They've masked their gods as Catholic Saints.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post

Voodoo
Submitted By: Moonflower13, Brother Dave
Definition: Voodoo combines the worst elements of two other Satan-glorifying religions, Witchcraft and catlickism. Believers are able to call upon demons to turn corpses into zombies under their control.
Worship: the Pope, toy dolls and Satan.



Please, prove me that Voodoo Bokors worship the Pope.
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 06-05-2023, 01:46 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati View Post
This is actually not a religion but a small fraction of a larger religion called Odinism.
Odinism, Onanism, same difference. They're all going to burn in Hell.

Quote:
You forgot to add that they've worshipped Prince Philip and that now they're probably worshipping King Charlie.
Good point. So you're not always wrong.

Quote:
Catholics do not worship Mary and Satan.
You erect idols to Mary and bow down before them and pray to her. As for worshiping Satan, most Catholics don't know that Satan is behind their church, but the priesthood does, so you're not weaseling out of this one. Click on this booklet for the truth about the Catholic Church-Satan connection.

Quote:
What kind of religion is called "Chinese University"? Does that mean that the Confucius Institute is a cult?

By the way, the only thing closer to that description is the Chinese Folk Religion, also called Shenism.
Shenists, sheenies, same difference. They're all doomed to an eternity in the Lake of Fire for their sins. Including the Confusionists.

Quote:
They also hate Catholics.
So they're not always wrong, either. Though we don't hate Catholics, even though many of them are members of lesser races such as Italians and Spaniards and Mexicans. We just hate the sins they commit by remaining in the Catholic Church.

Quote:
Wait, since when the Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy is a religious cult? Does that means that people who read Harry Pothead, Lord of the Rings and Chtulhu are also in a cult?
Since it was published, and yes.

Quote:
That only happened in your racist revisionist history.
You need to stop drinking the woke cool aid and learn some history written by someone other than a pampered and perverted academic. Go read a book by Ann Coulter or Tucker Carlson. You just might learn something.

Quote:
You believe the same, don't you?
No, we don't believe that Jesus will return as a gunfighter in the Old West. That would be ludicrous. When Jesus returns, it will be to Israel, and he will have a sword for a tongue, just as the Book of Revelation says.

Quote:
Wrong description. Santeros were never Catholics to being with. They've masked their gods as Catholic Saints.
That's pretty much the definition of Catholicism.

Quote:
Please, prove me that Voodoo Bokors worship the Pope.
Prove to us that they don't.


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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 06-05-2023, 01:25 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Romeo Rovagnati View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
Voodoo
Submitted By: Moonflower13, Brother Dave
Definition: Voodoo combines the worst elements of two other Satan-glorifying religions, Witchcraft and catlickism. Believers are able to call upon demons to turn corpses into zombies under their control.
Worship: the Pope,
toy dolls and Satan.
emphasis mine
Please, prove me that Voodoo Bokors worship the Pope.
CUDDLY
BERGOGLIO
DOLL
CUDDLY
RATZINGER
DOLL
INFLATABLE
"THE SCREAM"
DOLL
FEMALE
POPE
DOLL
JP2 DOLL WITH
ROTATING
HEAD

Just a few notes:

The cuddliness of the first two dolls does not prevent worship activities. It's worth mentioning that they can be distinguished by their pectoral crosses, more readily visible in the slightly larger versions: tap or click any picture for H=560px.

Not all dolls are knitted: the Wojtyła aka "JP2" doll is rendered in tasteful porcelain. As with some other toys, a spring-loaded base (operated by the thumbs) connects via the doll to spin the head in various directions.
• goes to 1k version.
It gets classier with each new iteration. The female pope doll exemplifies this. Her thumbnail at left links to a better view of the complete set, supplied with a cage for The Holy Spirit (in white enamel on her right) and a gilded gramophone to her left together with marble columns in what look like the Corinthian style. A fake post-impressionist still life in a gold frame sets it all off nicely. Other items are included which I won't bother to list but they're probably useful for the voodoos.

"Classy is not the word."
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Default Re: False Religions And Cults - 12-07-2023, 11:16 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pastor Billy-Reuben View Post
United Church of Christ
Submitted by: Larry Lee
The once-glorious True Christian™ Church of the Pilgrims and Puritans (who can forget "Sinners In The Hands Of An Angry God") has, in our time, so utterly embraced Satan that even the members of the UCC Divine Revelation that their Church's initials stand for 'Unitarians Considering Christ.' Furthermore, these debased hellhounds advocate the ordination of women and even install women as the pastors of congregations that include men. Lastly, I hope you're sitting down this malignant group welcomes gays and lesbians into their worship services and communities. Jesus weeps! Recently, they were in the news because the television networks refused to air their recruitment tape.
Worship: Satan
You forgot to add that Obama is part of this cult.
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