Today, I learned of a great horror. Remember children's books about "Winnie the Pooh"? It seems that they are inspired by something far more vile than a simple-minded stuffed bear with an eating disorder. No, author A. A. Milne appears to have been possessed by demons which called themselves the Elder Gods!

I found the lyrics to a song about this vile creature. My research indicates that Tom Smith did not actually write the song, but that the lyrics were actually found in the mad scribblings of Milne himself, who thought the bear to be quite real!
Keep your children away from Pooh!

I found the lyrics to a song about this vile creature. My research indicates that Tom Smith did not actually write the song, but that the lyrics were actually found in the mad scribblings of Milne himself, who thought the bear to be quite real!
Christopher Robin was slain on the altar,
Where shadows of Innsmouth run deep.
Pooh didn’t hesitate, Pooh didn’t falter,
His master’s in Rl’yeh asleep.
And I'm only a kid, I don't know what he’s doin’,
Let alone why the Great Old Ones want a stuffed bruin.
The Elder Gods got in his head.
Task after task he performs without asking
Why friend after friend turns up dead.
And the ultimate goal isn’t clearly defined,
But it’s taking a toll on his silly old mind.
(It was thought accidental at first);
In a room without corners, Owl was et by a hound;
In his chest, Tigger’s heart up and burst.
Now there’s only us three, but we will find a way,
And I Kanga-rantee, Eeyore gonna Roo the day….
Everything’s fine – Piglet, you can stop screaming –-
What’s with that dazed look, Pooh?
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh….
Where shadows of Innsmouth run deep.
Pooh didn’t hesitate, Pooh didn’t falter,
His master’s in Rl’yeh asleep.
And I'm only a kid, I don't know what he’s doin’,
Let alone why the Great Old Ones want a stuffed bruin.
Help me if you can, I’ve got to stop
Pooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
You’d be surprised, there’s so much to be done,
Circles to summon and bind,
Color them inside the lines,
Stop the cloth golem we all know as Winnie the Pooh….
Winnie the Pooh doesn’t know what he’s doing,Pooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
You’d be surprised, there’s so much to be done,
Circles to summon and bind,
Color them inside the lines,
Stop the cloth golem we all know as Winnie the Pooh….
The Elder Gods got in his head.
Task after task he performs without asking
Why friend after friend turns up dead.
And the ultimate goal isn’t clearly defined,
But it’s taking a toll on his silly old mind.
Help me if you can, I’ve got to stop
Pooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
You’d be surprised, there’s so much to be done,
Leave all the Deep Ones behind,
Making a cute Elder Sign,
Prepare for the final conflict with Winnie the Pooh….
Rabbit is missing, and Piglet was drownedPooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
You’d be surprised, there’s so much to be done,
Leave all the Deep Ones behind,
Making a cute Elder Sign,
Prepare for the final conflict with Winnie the Pooh….
(It was thought accidental at first);
In a room without corners, Owl was et by a hound;
In his chest, Tigger’s heart up and burst.
Now there’s only us three, but we will find a way,
And I Kanga-rantee, Eeyore gonna Roo the day….
Believe me if you can, we’re gonna stop
Pooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
What do you know, I think maybe we’re done,
Chris and my friends all alive,
Great Old Ones gone from the sky…
*yawn* Good morning, Mother, I guess I was dreaming –-Pooh from reviving Cthulhu by one,
What do you know, I think maybe we’re done,
Chris and my friends all alive,
Great Old Ones gone from the sky…
Everything’s fine – Piglet, you can stop screaming –-
What’s with that dazed look, Pooh?
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh….

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