[Nastistinn]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Okay.
Since most of the users here are older than my grandmother I would keep this as short as possible for you believers.

this is:

10 Reasons why Pastafari is actually god.

1: He created midgets
2: The Religion explains global warming and piracy is having a connection.
3: Pirate cloth is teh shit!
4: He is everywhere, there is pictures that proves! Because we can PROVE that he exists!
5: Hell is a myth! You can sin much as you want! (Start peeing on your couch)
6: It's a denial of darwinistic theory. The stuff you guys hate with all your heart.
7: Everyone loves spaghetti and meatballs!
8: There is no need to have a religion named after a boy name, when you can have a religion nearly named after some delicious food!
9: You can laugh of hatemails. The High Priest gets them a lot!
10: Do you hear the voices too?

Btw: To sign up for the new curch, you can visit. http://www.landoverbaptist.net

Post people!

ALL HAIL THE SPAGHETTI MONSTER!

And slaanesh ^^

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

I no longer allow my sons to eat spaghetti. Jo Freddie is at fault for that.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

I no longer allow my sons to eat spaghetti. Jo Freddie is at fault for that.

Really? Is your faith in your "god" so weak that a simple foodstuff threatens it?

How is your Beer consumption these days?

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Really? Is your faith in your "god" so weak that a simple foodstuff threatens it?

No. But I won't have them doing anything a Pastafarian would do.

How is your Beer consumption these days?

It's fine. I drink Old Milwaukee all the time when I'm not working, and sometimes when I am. Why do you ask?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

No. But I won't have them doing anything a Pastafarian would do.

We breath too, going to stop them doing that as-well?

It's fine. I drink Old Milwaukee all the time when I'm not working, and sometimes when I am. Why do you ask?

You do realise that drinking beer is an important part of Pastafarian culture don't you? In fact we almost always wash the pasta down with it.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Ok Pastafarian.

I am throwing down you are all.

You say your Flying Spaghetti Monster is real- PROVE IT

Explain the existence of cucumbers which I have shown as PROOF POSITIVE of the existence of God here:

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=20053

Or are you pirates chicken?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Explain the existence of cucumbers which I have shown as PROOF POSITIVE of the existence of God here:

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=20053

Your little article may or may not prove the existence of God, what is does not prove is that God is NOT the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I do not dispute that there is a God, the difference between us is I know who God is and you don't.

As for Proof of who God is I feel no need to go over things I have already posted in these topics, and has also been covered in this thread as-well.

• The Holy Noodle
• A Condensed History of the World

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Your little article may or may not prove the existence of God, what is does not prove is that God is NOT the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I do not dispute that there is a God, the difference between us is I know who God is and you don't.

As for Proof of who God is I feel no need to go over things I have already posted in these topics, and has also been covered in this thread as-well.

• The Holy Noodle
• A Condensed History of the World

Yes, we have our story, you have yours. Obviously only one side can be correct. That's why I propose the cucumber as the measure here. I think we both can agree cucumbers touch base here so they makes a good tool.

So again; clearly cucumbers are intelligently designed. So how did the FSM do this (if he exists)? Please keep in mind that cucumbers have many characteristics that go beyond salads.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

So again; clearly cucumbers are intelligently designed. So how did the FSM do this (if he exists)? Please keep in mind that cucumbers have many characteristics that go beyond salads.

You have already gone into much detail about how God made the cucumber, your theory may or may not be correct, but as God is the Flying Spaghetti Monster you have already explained a theory as to how the cucumber came to be.
I may disagree with your reasoning as to why, but not as to who, designed the cucumber, it was The Flying Spaghetti Monster for He Is Our Lord and Creator.

[John Creeser]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

I can prove the FSM doesn't exist - simply ask the heathen Bobby Henderson who made up the FSM in an open letter to the Kansas school board.

Nice religion stinky pirate. *files under false*

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

You have already gone into much detail about how God made the cucumber, your theory may or may not be correct, but as God is the Flying Spaghetti Monster you have already explained a theory as to how the cucumber came to be.
I may disagree with your reasoning as to why, but not as to who, designed the cucumber, it was The Flying Spaghetti Monster for He Is Our Lord and Creator.

Ah but the key point of The Christian's Cucumber argument is it is that only God as Christians understand Him who is fixated on what people put up their butts. From what I have seen the Flying Spaghetti Monster could cares about what people stick in their mouths, not anywhere else. While I will concede we can assume the FSM would be against anally inserting pasta I see no specific prohibition from the FSM against it or anything else.

Face it, if the FSM isn't obsessed with butt sex then the FSM doesn't exist.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Ah but the key point of The Christian's Cucumber argument is it is that only God as Christians understand Him who is fixated on what people put up their butts. From what I have seen the Flying Spaghetti Monster could cares about what people stick in their mouths, not anywhere else. While I will concede we can assume the FSM would be against anally inserting pasta I see no specific prohibition from the FSM against it or anything else.

Face it, if the FSM isn't obsessed with butt sex then the FSM doesn't exist.

The FSM is not obsessed with anyone's sexual activity, and is cool with anything provided they do not offend themselves or their partner (Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity).

It is your obsession with what people do with their or other peoples bottoms that leads you to your conclusion as to why God designed the Cucumber.

When I look at a cucumber I see a wonderful gift form Our Lord that makes a great addition to a salad.

[Hellbound_Alchemist]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

1: He created midgets
Midgets are evil spawn of Satan
2: The Religion explains global warming and piracy is having a connection.
Global warming is a myth created by homer tree hugging hippy demoncrats
3: Pirate cloth is teh shit!
Turning sh*t into cloth is impressive but not God like
But remember: "And it shall come to pass in the day of the LORD's sacrifice, that I will punish the princes, and the king's children, and all such as are clothed with strange apparel." Zephaniah 1:8
4: He is everywhere, there is pictures that proves! Because we can PROVE that he exists!
If it's not in the Bible (KJV1611) then it's not true
5: Hell is a myth! You can sin much as you want! (Start peeing on your couch)
You'll change that belief while the demons are invading your backside in Hell
6: It's a denial of darwinistic theory. The stuff you guys hate with all your heart.
Pirates are just monkeys with fancy clothes
7: Everyone loves spaghetti and meatballs!
The garlic eating Eytalian catylicks invented spaghetti
8: There is no need to have a religion named after a boy name, when you can have a religion nearly named after some delicious food!
Nothing is more delicious than the love of Jesus
9: You can laugh of hatemails. The High Priest gets them a lot!
Huh?
10: Do you hear the voices too?
Yes. Praise the Lord and one true God and Jesus.

Ok, mark christ, <---for starters, dont we think highly of ourselves...if my memory serves me correct, the book you people call the bible says that PRIDE GOETH BEFORE FALL...suck on that one, while im on the topic of sucking, your statement of nothing being more delicious than the love of jesus, sounds really homo-erotic...more-over why would you wanna blow the son of christ?? You are a one sick fornicator..really man.
While im on such a beautiful role, midgets ARE NOT the spawn satan, but are instead your god's little punch line, also if you "people" were as intelligent as you think, you'll know that its been proven that midgets, are a genetic deformity, but alas your aren't.
Moving on, your god is as "real" as this persons god...and your a closed minded douche monger for believing that your tome, is the only right one. Might i remind you that the tome you call the "bible" was written by the hands of mortals, and rewritten by the hands of corrupt mortals...hmmm looking at it from that POV(Point Of View for you...you...hell i cant think of anythin to call you) your "holy bible" isnt so holy, it appears to me that its quite sullied.
Finally mark christ, you should really check yourself into the nearest mental institution...im serious, if your hearing the voice of a being that you cannot produce hard proof of its existence, your in desperate need of medical help from those with the proper education, and training.

[Rapture Eddie]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Ok, mark christ, <---for starters, dont we think highly of ourselves...if my memory serves me correct, the book you people call the bible says that PRIDE GOETH BEFORE FALL...suck on that one, while im on the topic of sucking, your statement of nothing being more delicious than the love of jesus, sounds really homo-erotic...more-over why would you wanna blow the son of christ?? You are a one sick fornicator..really man.
While im on such a beautiful role, midgets ARE NOT the spawn satan, but are instead your god's little punch line, also if you "people" were as intelligent as you think, you'll know that its been proven that midgets, are a genetic deformity, but alas your aren't.
Moving on, your god is as "real" as this persons god...and your a closed minded douche monger for believing that your tome, is the only right one. Might i remind you that the tome you call the "bible" was written by the hands of mortals, and rewritten by the hands of corrupt mortals...hmmm looking at it from that POV(Point Of View for you...you...hell i cant think of anythin to call you) your "holy bible" isnt so holy, it appears to me that its quite sullied.
Finally mark christ, you should really check yourself into the nearest mental institution...im serious, if your hearing the voice of a being that you cannot produce hard proof of its existence, your in desperate need of medical help from those with the proper education, and training.

Now, don't tell me.......... let me guess.....
You are not only a ginger but you are also a midget?

[Didymus Much]

Re: 10 Reasons that god is a flying spaghetti monster!

Now, don't tell me.......... let me guess.....
You are not only a ginger but you are also a midget?

If he's left-handed, we just hit the Trifecta.