[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

"How can 2,000,000 blacks get into Washington, DC in 1 day in sub zero temps when 200,000 couldn't get out of New Orleans in 85 degree temps with four days notice?"

- Florida Republican State Committeewoman Carol Carter

[Jeb Stuart Thurmond]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I don't know if we're allowed to post things like this, so here's a link.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I don't know if we're allowed to post things like this, so here's a link.

I heard some joos and liberals have started whining about that comic being racist somehow. Personally I don't see it.

[Bob4God]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Knock Knock!

Who's there?

Orange!

Orange Who?







Orange you going to accept JESUS as your personal LORD and SAVIOR?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I don't know if we're allowed to post things like this, so here's a link.

Have you seen his top 10? There's some great stuff in there. Hilarious.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Two old school mates, Tony Bennett and Sam Plank went into the music business when they left school. They opened a little Discotheque in the small town where they lived. One day, Tony got run over by a bus. He was such a good man that he went straight to heaven. The years passed by and Tony married another Angel. One day Tony turns to his wife and says " I wonder how my old mate Sam is doing.?"

She replied, “You’re due for a weekend pass, why don't you pop down and see him?"
So Sam puts on his best long white Angel gown, dusts off his best gold harp and sets off.

The weekend went well. He visited some of his own haunts, and frightened the life out of Sam.
He gets back to Heavens Gate and ten to twelve Sunday night. He is just about to knock on the door, when he looks down. "Oh NO!" he yells, and scampers back to Earth.

Three o’clock in the morning he returns. His wife is waiting outside the door to Heaven, her hair in curlers with a rolling pin in her hand. “Where’ve you been!"

Tony looks at her, smiles, opens his arms and starts singing
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"I left my harp, in Sam Planks Disco"

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

"I left my harp, in Sam Planks Disco"

That's racist and gay.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

That's racist and gay.

This was a completely different Tony Bennett

[JennyD]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Before I was widowed at the tender age of 24, my dear husband bought me a mood ring, so he would know what sort of mood I was in.

It worked really well!

If I was in a good mood, the stone turned green.

If I was in a really foul mood, the stone left a huge red mark on his forehead.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

That was uppity. It sounds like the kind of joke lezbeans tell each other.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

That was uppity. It sounds like the kind of joke lezbeans tell each other.

Yet another reason why women should not be allowed to talk to each other without male supervision.

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Pope vs Rabbi

Several years ago, the Pope decreed that all the Jews had to leave Jerusalem. There was a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope offered a deal. He would have a religious debate with the leader of the Jewish community. If the Jews won, they could stay in Jerusalem; if the Pope won, they would have to leave.

The Jewish people met and picked an aged and wise Rabbi to represent them in the debate. However, as the Rabbi spoke no Italian, and the Pope spoke no Yiddish, they agreed that it would be a 'silent' debate.

On the chosen day the Pope and Rabbi sat opposite each other. The Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. The Rabbi looked back and raised one finger. Next, the Pope waved his finger around his head. The Rabbi pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope brought out a communion wafer and a chalice of wine. The Rabbi pulled out an apple. With that the Pope stood up and declared that he was beaten, and that the Rabbi was too clever. The Jews could stay in Jerusalem.

Later the Cardinals met with the Pope and asked him what had happened?
The Pope said, First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity He responded by holding up one finger to remind me there is still only one God common to both our beliefs. Then, I waved my finger around my head to show him that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground to show that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer, to show that God absolves us of all our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of the original sin. He had beaten me at every move and I could not continue.

Meanwhile, the Jewish community gathered to ask the Rabbi how he had won.

'I haven't a clue' said the Rabbi. First he said to me that we had three days to get out of Jerusalem, so I gave him the finger. Then he tells me that they will round us up and throw us out. I said to him that we were staying right here. 'And then what?' asked a woman. 'Who knows?' said the Rabbi. 'He took out his lunch so I took out mine'

[Nobar King]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

I didn't get that. Can someone explain it in fewer words?

[JennyD]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

That was uppity. It sounds like the kind of joke lezbeans tell each other.

Does Sister BTB know you're spending your time hanging around such women?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Good, Clean Christian Jokes

Does Sister BTB know you're spending your time hanging around such women?

She knows that I study them in my basement.