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  • oddbod
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    • Jun 2011
    • 19

    #211
    Re: Holocaust Jokes

    Originally posted by Zechariah Smyth View Post
    You really need to work on your delivery.

    I mean, that was almost funny, but it missed the mark by about 3477 cubits.

    Yours in Christ,

    Z. Smyth
    I know, this humour that's not actually meant to be funny isn't very funny at all is it? A bit like all these "jokes."

    Comment

    • Zechariah Smyth
      Walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
      True Christian™
      • Feb 2011
      • 15251

      #212
      Re: Holocaust Jokes

      Originally posted by oddbod View Post
      I know, this humour that's not actually meant to be funny isn't very funny at all is it? A bit like all these "jokes."
      Look, if you don't have a sense of humor, why click on a joke thread? It seems like a waste of your time and a waste of God's bandwidth.

      YiC,

      Z. Smyth

      P.S.

      Q: Why was the joo so popular at the alcoholic party?

      A: He was a lampshade!!!
      sigpic

      Comment

      • oddbod
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        • Jun 2011
        • 19

        #213
        Re: Holocaust Jokes

        Originally posted by Titus Templeton
        You are uninvited to this thread, filthy scum!
        The jews killed Jesus, thats the greatest sin anyone can do.
        Actually it was the Romans who killed Jesus. They commited the act. The Romans later adopted Christianity ironically enough.

        Oh by the way, it was Catholics who wrote your Holy Book (unless you have an Urtext Edition of course.)

        Comment

        • Dr. Isaiah Jones
          Christ's Antiquarius
          True Christian™ Creation Scientist
          True Christian™
          • Mar 2011
          • 736

          #214
          Re: Holocaust Jokes

          Originally posted by oddbod View Post
          Oh by the way, it was Catholics who wrote your Holy Book (unless you have an Urtext Edition of course.)
          That is NOT true. God wrote the Bible through the hands of His holy prophets.
          2 Timothy 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

          2 Peter 1:21 For the prophecy came not in old time by the will of man: but holy men of God spake as they were moved by the Holy Ghost.[/I]
          How "My Little Pony" Turns Men Gay Through Subliminal Mind Control
          The Tyrannosaurus Rex: A Creationist Perspective
          How Newton's Laws PROVE God's Existence
          God HATES Carbon Dating

          2nd Timothy 6:20-21 O Timothy, keep that which is committed to thy trust, avoiding profane and vain babblings, and oppositions of science falsely so called: Which some professing have erred concerning the faith. Grace be with thee. Amen.

          Comment

          • slixor
            Forum Member
            Forum Member
            • Jun 2011
            • 31

            #215
            Re: Holocaust Jokes

            A news reporter goes to see a Jewish man who has been going to the western wall in Israel to pray once a day for 70 years, the reporter goes up to him and says, "hello I'm a reporter for the BBC and we know you're quite famous around this wall so we were wondering if we could ask you a few questions." The man agrees and she asks, "so we were wondering; what have you actually been praying for all of these years?"

            The man replies, "I have been praying for peace between the Jews and Arabs and for all world hatred and terrorism to stop, and for my children and grandchildren to grown up in a peaceful world."

            The news reporter says, "Wow that's truly beautiful, how do you feel after doing this for 70 years?"

            The man replies, "I feel like I've been talking to a fucking brick wall."

            Comment

            • Pastor Ezekiel
              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
               
              • Sep 2006
              • 78552

              #216
              Re: Holocaust Jokes

              Originally posted by Evan314 View Post
              May I ask where all of the anti-semitism stems from? Yes, I understand it was the Jewish people who sent Jesus to his death, but are all Jews really bad people??? I know of multiple Jewish people who are very nice, and it seems to me that this is a large hasty generalization against the Jews. And also, I don't worship satan, or promote prostitution as many of you have thrown upon others trying to ask these same questions.
              Dear kike-lover;

              Joos killed Jesus, and that's enough to get them hated by God. "Being nice" has nothing to do with it. Unless they become perfected (convert to True Christianity(tm)), they are bound to spend eternity in hell cooking porkfat burgers for the mudslimes.

              YIC,

              --Pastor Ezekiel
              Who Will Jesus Damn?

              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

              Comment

              • Born Again Bob
                True Christian™
                True Christian™
                • Sep 2006
                • 2318

                #217
                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                More Oddbod thread-derailing bloviation moved here.

                Comment

                • slixor
                  Forum Member
                  Forum Member
                  • Jun 2011
                  • 31

                  #218
                  Re: Holocaust Jokes

                  I have another joke for all of you.

                  A Jewish man has opened a convenience store in our town. I walked in and said, "There's a sign in your window that says, 'Bottles of wine - Buy One Get One'. I think you're missing a 'free' at the end."

                  He said, "No I'm not."
                  Last edited by slixor; 06-04-2011, 10:25 PM. Reason: mis-type

                  Comment

                  • Johansen
                    Forum Member
                    Forum Member
                    • May 2011
                    • 35

                    #219
                    Re: Holocaust Jokes

                    Q: How many jews can you get into a car?
                    A: Three in the back, two in the front, and eighteen in the ashtray.
                    "Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10

                    Comment

                    • slixor
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Jun 2011
                      • 31

                      #220
                      Re: Holocaust Jokes

                      What did the Jews like best about Auschwitz?

                      The free haircuts.

                      (Sorry if I'm being too active in this thread, but I find these hilarious!)

                      Comment

                      • Brother Enoch
                        The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
                        True Christian™
                        • Jun 2008
                        • 4392

                        #221
                        Re: Holocaust Jokes

                        Originally posted by slixor View Post
                        What did the Jews like best about Auschwitz?

                        The free haircuts.

                        (Sorry if I'm being too active in this thread, but I find these hilarious!)
                        Are you planning on contributing a hilarious one soon?

                        Question: Why don't Jewish cannibals like eating Germans? Answer: They give them gas.

                        Comment

                        • slixor
                          Forum Member
                          Forum Member
                          • Jun 2011
                          • 31

                          #222
                          Re: Holocaust Jokes

                          Originally posted by Brother Enoch View Post
                          Are you planning on contributing a hilarious one soon?

                          Question: Why don't Jewish cannibals like eating Germans? Answer: They give them gas.
                          I'm trying

                          I just noticed that the German airports were closed because of ash from an Icelandic volcano.

                          Doubt it will be for long, the Germans have experience in clearing ash.

                          Comment

                          • Titus Templeton
                            Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade
                            Jesus macht frei
                            True Christian™
                            • Aug 2010
                            • 5912

                            #223
                            Re: Holocaust Jokes

                            Originally posted by slixor View Post
                            I'm trying

                            I just noticed that the German airports were closed because of ash from an Icelandic volcano.

                            Doubt it will be for long, the Germans have experience in clearing ash.
                            -The Parable of the white laundry and the black man
                            -Scientific proof that GAY SEX IS UNHYGIENIC!
                            -Holocaust Jokes
                            -Diarrhea: The Va​ginal Lubrication of the Homosexuals
                            -Anne Frank vs. Adolf Hitler: Who was the worse person?
                            -10 Reasons why GOD HATES FRANCE!
                            -5 Reasons why GOD HATES LEAGUE OF LEGENDS!
                            -Today I am declaring War against Woman's Rights!

                            Comment

                            • Pastor Ezekiel
                              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                               
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 78552

                              #224
                              Re: Holocaust Jokes

                              What's the difference between joos and Boyscouts?


                              Boyscouts come back from their camps!
                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

                              • RevDrJack
                                Confirmed Enemy of God
                                • May 2011
                                • 249

                                #225
                                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                                Whats the object of Jooish football?
                                To get the quarter back.

                                Comment

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