[HTannor]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

What a great, great evening.

Choir Girl, you looked stunning in the new gown. Roger was thrilled with you as his companion for the evening. He says he was very sorry about scuffing your new Pradas when his chair backed over your foot. He hopes the swelling goes down soon.

It was very touching watching you slice up his chicken, give the bites to Skippy and watch the little monkey shove the food in Roger's mouth. Roger told me he has made extensive studies of the upscale materials in fine dresses and is sure his drool in your lap won't leave a lasting stain.

I haven't laid eyes on Jolene since she staggered off towards the one remaining open bar. I hope someone gave her a ride home.

The Dingle Sisters, Dolly and Dotty, were last seen ducking into the cloak room with four of those guys Rev. Jim brought from the west coast. Neither of the girls seemed all that concerned that one of them was a chink. But, you know the girls, they're all about diversity and inclusiveness.


Now, I'd like to give all of you an update on Rev. Rodimer. When it was announced that he wasn't able to attend, I grew quite concerned.

Some of you might have noticed Skippy and I leaving through a side door. We felt obligated to go check on the Reverend, so we made a quick visit to his house.

The good Reverend was clearly in some discomfort but graciously allowed us to come in and check upon his condition.

Skippy is quite adept at sensing the well-being of humans and rushed to the Reverend's side. Skippy wanted to comfort the Reverend and began humping hugging his ear. I took a quick shot with my cell phone camera so you all can see how the Reverend was enjoying the attention Skippy was giving him.





Well, I'm off for a quick nap in preparation for the epic struggle this afternoon between the negoidals of Iowa State University versus the negroidals of the University of Iowa.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Friends what a great turn out it was. The food was outstanding as was the company. I have the numbers totaled for the event.
pictures with Ogc Don $ 300,000
attendance $1,188.000
silent auction proceeds
Trip to Hawaii $5,400
Cadillac SUV $59,000
Special seating at Church $12,500
Diamond ring $37,500
First edition KJV1611 Bible $102,000
For a total of $1,705,400.00 I will deposit proceeds into Ofc Don's campaign fund on Monday


On a side note, Thank you to all who attended and supported this event with your kind donations. Your generosity will be noted by Jesus and our next Sheriff.

P.S. Brother Tannor next time could you keep Skippy on a leash? While I was dancing with Phebe, the little fellow crapped in one of my Italian dress shoes. Normally I do not remove my shoes but my right foot was a bit swollen after one of the ladies, I think it was Dolly , kind of crushed it at the bar. How much does that woman weigh?

[HTannor]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

P.S. Brother Tannor next time could you keep Skippy on a leash? While I was dancing with Phebe, the little fellow crapped in one of my Italian dress shoes.

Sorry about the poo on your Gucci's. I've already talked to Roger about this and Roger looks forward to holding Skippy's leash in his mouth. He figures the net effect will be similar to flossing his teeth.

Normally I do not remove my shoes but my right foot was a bit swollen after one of the ladies, I think it was Dolly , kind of crushed it at the bar. How much does that woman weigh?

Dolly told me she thought someone was playing footsies with her at the bar and was concerned that little chink friend of Rev. Osborne would get jealous of someone else trying to hit on her. She said she stomped the mysterious foot, heard the howl of pain, and the slant just lit up knowing he had her total attention.

I don’t think it’s an issue of her weight so much as she was wearing a new pair of Manolos and the PSI on a pair of spike heels must be intense. Are you up to date on your tetanus shots?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Rev. Rodimer,

You certainly were missed! I do hope to see you here in the near future! Helen called me late yesterday afternoon and it seems she is heading here on Tuesday.

YIC

Sister Phebe.

Wonderful! She has been eager to get on with her life since her business failed and her home burned to the ground in a mysterious fire, leaving her nothing but the insurance money.

Some of you might have noticed Skippy and I leaving through a side door. We felt obligated to go check on the Reverend, so we made a quick visit to his house.

The good Reverend was clearly in some discomfort but graciously allowed us to come in and check upon his condition.

Skippy is quite adept at sensing the well-being of humans and rushed to the Reverend's side. Skippy wanted to comfort the Reverend and began humping hugging his ear. I took a quick shot with my cell phone camera so you all can see how the Reverend was enjoying the attention Skippy was giving him.

I was rather curious how you managed to get from Iowa to Indiana in such short order.

My housekeeper, Rosa, suspects witchcraft. Are you sure that monkey isn't demonic?

[Ofc. Don W. Richards]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

First, I just want to say thanks to everybody who attended. It was a fantastic evening and I'm sure many of us will remember it for years to come.

I am a bit disappointed, however, that nobody has mentioned my stirring rendition of "The Old Rugged Cross."

I took the overwhelming silence throughout the room as a sign that the Lord had truly blessed my listeners, but it should've worn off by now.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

I am a bit disappointed, however, that nobody has mentioned my stirring rendition of "The Old Rugged Cross."

Well...erm.. What is there to say! Words cannot even begin to describe the ...no..just no words... I for one had never before heard a rendition of it go for 1h..45 minutes..the way you sustained each and every single note...was..umm...something.

I did notice that some people enjoyed it more than others. Roger for one was asleep in no time once you started. It must be that lullaby like quality and tone you have.

I took the overwhelming silence throughout the room as a sign that the Lord had truly blessed my listeners, but it should've worn off by now.[/FONT]

Yes.. that was it.. the Lord had blessed us all......mysterious ways...miracle...



YIC

Mrs Phebe Dewitt

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

First, I just want to say thanks to everybody who attended. It was a fantastic evening and I'm sure many of us will remember it for years to come.

I am a bit disappointed, however, that nobody has mentioned my stirring rendition of "The Old Rugged Cross."

I took the overwhelming silence throughout the room as a sign that the Lord had truly blessed my listeners, but it should've worn off by now.

I'm sorry to have missed it!

Perhaps Skippy wasn't the only threat the Lord was protecting my ears from.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

I'm sorry to have missed it!

Perhaps Skippy wasn't the only threat the Lord was protecting my ears from.

Well, you know he made a DVD of the event, I think it should be on sale by next week latest. I bet he would rush you a copy since you weren't able to be there. If I remember correctly, after the song Pastor Zeke let us all know about the DVD and how the profits of its sales would be divided between the Ofc. Richards war chest and his Young Men's bible study group as they were saving up for a field trip to Bangkok in the Spring. I believe he said they would be on sale for $1000 A COPY, Autographed of course! How many should I pencil you in for?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Well, you know he made a DVD of the event, I think it should be on sale by next week latest. I bet he would rush you a copy since you weren't able to be there. If I remember correctly, after the song Pastor Zeke let us all know about the DVD and how the profits of its sales would be divided between the Ofc. Richards war chest and his Young Men's bible study group as they were saving up for a field trip to Bangkok in the Spring. I believe he said they would be on sale for $1000 A COPY, Autographed of course! How many should I pencil you in for?

I will have to ask my Board if they are willing to expend funds to support Officer Richards, who has allowed crime to run rampant in Freehold by letting Negroes run free as well as the Spring Heeled Jack(son).

Who knows where that vile monster will strike next?

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Well, you know he made a DVD of the event, I think it should be on sale by next week latest. I bet he would rush you a copy since you weren't able to be there. If I remember correctly, after the song Pastor Zeke let us all know about the DVD and how the profits of its sales would be divided between the Ofc. Richards war chest and his Young Men's bible study group as they were saving up for a field trip to Bangkok in the Spring. I believe he said they would be on sale for $1000 A COPY, Autographed of course! How many should I pencil you in for?

Does the DVD include where he did the smooth transition from "the Rugged Old Cross" onto "Old Turkey Buzzard"?

I don't know if everyone realized the song had changed actually..1hr and 20mins in.

If it does include that, I would like 5 copies at least! There are several people I know well deserving of such a gift.

YIC

Sister Phebe.

[Benedict A. Davis]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Does the DVD include where he did the smooth transition from "the Rugged Old Cross" onto "Old Turkey Buzzard"?

I don't know if everyone realized the song had changed actually..1hr and 20mins in.

If it does include that, I would like 5 copies at least! There are several people I know well deserving of such a gift.

YIC

Sister Phebe.

Sister P
I am not sure what is on the DVD yet as I have not received my copy yet. It was The Pastors, Young Mens Bible Study Group if I remember correctly. At least that is what I was told when they came around taking deposits for advanced orders.It was odd though as they only accepted cash last night but I figure it was something to do with credit card fees they would have had to pay. Guess you will need to ask someone affiliated with that group or ask Pastor Zeke himself.

[James Dewitt]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

Sister P
I am not sure what is on the DVD yet as I have not received my copy yet. It was The Pastors, Young Mens Bible Study Group if I remember correctly. At least that is what I was told when they came around taking deposits for advanced orders.It was odd though as they only accepted cash last night but I figure it was something to do with credit card fees they would have had to pay. Guess you will need to ask someone affiliated with that group or ask Pastor Zeke himself.

Yep that was the young men's group. The credit card machine went haywire. So cash was the only way that we could take orders. It will take apx. 4 to 6 weeks to process the order. Until then just close your eyes and like a nightmare wonderful dream you will be able to hear that voice. Does anyone else have a headache today? Must have been the fruit punch. That damn monkey wasn't by the punch was he? I am going to get that monkey, pooping in my favorite shoes! Lucky that I have 49 more pair of them!

[Choir Girl]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

What a great, great evening.

Choir Girl, you looked stunning in the new gown. Roger was thrilled with you as his companion for the evening. He says he was very sorry about scuffing your new Pradas when his chair backed over your foot. He hopes the swelling goes down soon.

It was very touching watching you slice up his chicken, give the bites to Skippy and watch the little monkey shove the food in Roger's mouth. Roger told me he has made extensive studies of the upscale materials in fine dresses and is sure his drool in your lap won't leave a lasting stain.

Why thank you Brother Tannor. I really owe it all to Sister Phebe She and her entourage of nimble fingered seamstress’s put me together right fine. And don’t give a second thought to the swollen foot… I found a fancy champagne ice bucket to soak it in.

You know I thought Skippy was on excellent behavior, only once did he get carried away jerking a chicken bone in and out of Rogers’s nose

However, I was questioned several times by elders about the stain in my lap. They all immediately assumed I had either wet myself or someone rubbed against me too long and too hard while slow dancing. Oh my gosh… THAT was embarrassing


But all in all it was a wonderful event! Thank you again for the invite

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

However, I was questioned several times by elders about the stain in my lap. They all immediately assumed I had either wet myself or someone rubbed against me too long and too hard while slow dancing. Oh my gosh… THAT was embarrassing

Surely you informed them that you only give Christian Side Hugs?

[Brother Harold Porter]

Re: Political Fund Raiser for Ofc Richards.

The evening sounds like quite the sordid affair

Was there any mention at all of our Savior?

"If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as of the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 4:11 - KJV

All this talk of stains, primate feces, dirty dancing and undulating hips makes me sad