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  • Landover Thanksgiving Video!

    This is one of the rush extracts from a 5 hour video of Life in Freehold on Thanksgiving Day (including a 3 hour sermon by Pastor Zeke.)

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    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

  • #2
    Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

    I wish I could have been there, it brings tears to my eyes.
    Matthew:
    5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
    5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
    10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
    10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


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    • #3
      Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

      Sweet Jesus what a night that was! I felt the Holy Spirit in every pore of my body!

      I can't wait for the entire video to be released! Hundreds will turn their lives over to Christ on that day!
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

        The kids said it was "boring" but when they grow up they will cherish the memories.



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        • #5
          Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

          SHOUT GLORY!

          There will come a day when we take back the country and rid ourselves of those "secular" laws that force our fine upstanding members to have to don those hoods. It is hard to breathing there and if you are BLESSED by being picked to handle the burning cross of OUR LORD, it get's stuffy.

          At least the smoke stuck in my hood gives me a reason for my eyes to wtaer, unlike some other sissyfied people here. I am looking at you, Brother Mayfield! Does someone need a prayer intervention?
          Yours In Christ,

          Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

          Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

          Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
          Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
          The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
          Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
          How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
          20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
          God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
          Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
          Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
          Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
          There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
          Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

          Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

          Comment


          • #6
            Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

            Originally posted by Graham Christian View Post
            SHOUT GLORY!

            There will come a day when we take back the country and rid ourselves of those "secular" laws that force our fine upstanding members to have to don those hoods. It is hard to breathing there and if you are BLESSED by being picked to handle the burning cross of OUR LORD, it get's stuffy.

            At least the smoke stuck in my hood gives me a reason for my eyes to wtaer, unlike some other sissyfied people here. I am looking at you, Brother Mayfield! Does someone need a prayer intervention?
            You are one post from being banned. Choose your next words very carefully. I would suggest a long and sincere apology.
            Matthew:
            5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
            5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
            10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
            10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


            sigpic

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

              Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
              You are one post from being banned. Choose your next words very carefully. I would suggest a long and sincere apology.
              I deeply apologize. I don't know what came over me. I am sure that there is a good and HOLY reason that such a GOD FEARING man as yourself would cry at a parade. I believe that in my desire to help other avoid sissyfication I lost my head and forgot my place. I will now go into my pray closet and read all of Leviticus.

              Twice.
              Yours In Christ,

              Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

              Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

              Stoning Sinners: A How-To Guide
              Scientific Study: Bible is NOT "All About Love"
              The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
              Should we only follow SOME of the Bible?
              How will YOU sacrifice your kids?
              20 Questions To See If Your Son Is A Fag
              God: Dress Like A Whore...Get Raped!
              Bible: If You Love Your Wife, Beat Her!
              Logic and Bible Agree: Gay is a choice!
              Nursery Rhymes Teach kids that Christ is Lord!
              There is no such thing as an "agnostic!"
              Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

              Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

                Originally posted by eliot mayfield View Post
                I wish I could have been there, it brings tears to my eyes.


                Originally posted by Graham Christian View Post
                I deeply apologize. I don't know what came over me. I am sure that there is a good and HOLY reason that such a GOD FEARING man as yourself would cry at a parade. I believe that in my desire to help other avoid sissyfication I lost my head and forgot my place. I will now go into my pray closet and read all of Leviticus.

                Twice.
                1. I wasn't at the parade.
                2. Tears to your eyes is not the same as "crying"
                3. tears TO your eyes, doesn't mean they run down your cheeks.

                4. As a good Christian, I forgive you.
                Matthew:
                5:17 Think not that I am come to destroy the law, or the prophets: I am not come to destroy, but to fulfil.
                5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled
                10:21 And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death.
                10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.


                sigpic

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

                  Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
                  This is one of the rush extracts from a 5 hour video of Life in Freehold on Thanksgiving Day (including a 3 hour sermon by Pastor Zeke.)
                  Brother Bathfire, I didn't think Rush was the sort of band you'd have at Landover. Aren't they demon-worshipping gothtard homosexuals and lesbians?



                  Why, that flat-chested woman on the left has "camel toe!"

                  Oh, of course. You meant RUSH!

                  Bible boring? Nonsense!
                  Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                  You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

                    Shout GLORY!!!
                    Who Will Jesus Damn?

                    Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                    Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                    Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Landover Thanksgiving Video!

                      Seeing this video made me sorry I couldn't be in Freehold for Thanksgiving in 2009, and doubly sorry I wasn't there this year. I do hope the Knights of Krits's Krucifixion approve my membership soon. They said there as some holdup because of my Jewish heritage, but I imagine they'll get that straightened out soon.
                      WARNING:
                      In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
                      REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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