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Now that Romney has all but gained the Republican nomination for President of the United States in this upcoming election it is time for all us Republicans to get behind this candidate, like him or not, and bolster him to the top come November. True, I've slung a lot of negativity at Romney these last few months in hopes that another candidate would defeat him, but for every critical statement like "I'd rather pay a 12 year old Mexican anchor baby my year's salary to set an M-80 off in my urethra and then let a colony of fire ants have their way with whatever's left of my manhood than see someone as patently unqualified as Mitt Romney win the Presidency (February 15th, 2012)," there's a dozen beaming statements of endorsement like "It looks like I'm going to have to vote for Romney come November (April 19th, 2012)." In other words I've come around to the guy.
In the following post I'm going to juxtapose my comments that were critical of Romney vs. my recent shining comments of our Republican Presidential candidate to show that I am truly behind this guy.
Slightly critical quote:
"Mitt Romney is so out of touch with the average American it's like he's some sort of autistic robot that hails from a distant planet that's made entirely out of money. I don't see any scenario where he wins the majority of blue collar votes (September 26th, 2011)."
Vs. gleaming example of my approval of this candidate:
"I think many Americans will have no problem voting for Mitt Romney come November (April 20th, 2012)."
Harsh but fair observation about Romney:
"Every time this guy opens his mouth it seems like he is trying to compete with Santorum to see who can alienate female voters the quickest. I would go so far as to say that a life-sized cardboard cutout in a 7-11 of Charles Barkley selling Vagasil has a better chance of winning the female vote at this point (February 6th, 2012)."
Vs. Extremely positive endorsement:
"I think that his record on women's rights issues speaks for itself (April 16th, 2012)."
Taken out of context this does seem rather harsh, and taken in context it's also pretty harsh:
"Romney has been trying to drum up support by ritualistically committing political suicide every time he's in front of a microphone by putting on some kind of bizarre Christo-Facsist, Woman-hating Kabuki theater and it's not going to work (March 8th, 2012)."
Vs. What I truly believe:
"I believe the Romney campaign has made a series of very sound political decisions to get to where it is today."
Slightly negative comment:
"Romney flip flops so much you'd think he's a fish out of water. And like that invasive Asian Carp I caught last week, all I want to do is bash his brains in with an oar to help prevent him from continuing to poison America (August 13th, 2011)."
Vs. Beaming praise of our future Republican nominee:
"Romney's change of heart on a variety of subjects shows a certain level of maturity, and I believe his varying stances will make him appealing even to Liberal voters (April 18th, 2011)."
A little rough:
"The Romney Presidency would be a bigger abortion than the one his parents should have gotten (June 11th, 2011)."
Vs. How I feel now:
"Mitt Romney is a candidate for the Presidency in 2012 (April 14th, 2012)."
Extremely harsh but still warranted criticism:
"The only way I will vote for Mitt Romney is if he uses his Mormon witchcraft to curse me, causing me to vote for him against my will, at which point, faced with the knowledge that I've just voted for Romney, I will fling myself out a tenth story window and plunge to my horrible death (April 9th, 2012)."
Vs. My current opinion:
"Yes, I'm planning on voting for Mitt Romney (April 10th, 2012)."
So hopefully this clears a few things up about my stance on Mitt Romney: I support the man fully for the Presidency and plan on voting for him in November, unless Chris Christie jumps into the race.
In the following post I'm going to juxtapose my comments that were critical of Romney vs. my recent shining comments of our Republican Presidential candidate to show that I am truly behind this guy.
Slightly critical quote:
"Mitt Romney is so out of touch with the average American it's like he's some sort of autistic robot that hails from a distant planet that's made entirely out of money. I don't see any scenario where he wins the majority of blue collar votes (September 26th, 2011)."
Vs. gleaming example of my approval of this candidate:
"I think many Americans will have no problem voting for Mitt Romney come November (April 20th, 2012)."
Harsh but fair observation about Romney:
"Every time this guy opens his mouth it seems like he is trying to compete with Santorum to see who can alienate female voters the quickest. I would go so far as to say that a life-sized cardboard cutout in a 7-11 of Charles Barkley selling Vagasil has a better chance of winning the female vote at this point (February 6th, 2012)."
Vs. Extremely positive endorsement:
"I think that his record on women's rights issues speaks for itself (April 16th, 2012)."
Taken out of context this does seem rather harsh, and taken in context it's also pretty harsh:
"Romney has been trying to drum up support by ritualistically committing political suicide every time he's in front of a microphone by putting on some kind of bizarre Christo-Facsist, Woman-hating Kabuki theater and it's not going to work (March 8th, 2012)."
Vs. What I truly believe:
"I believe the Romney campaign has made a series of very sound political decisions to get to where it is today."
Slightly negative comment:
"Romney flip flops so much you'd think he's a fish out of water. And like that invasive Asian Carp I caught last week, all I want to do is bash his brains in with an oar to help prevent him from continuing to poison America (August 13th, 2011)."
Vs. Beaming praise of our future Republican nominee:
"Romney's change of heart on a variety of subjects shows a certain level of maturity, and I believe his varying stances will make him appealing even to Liberal voters (April 18th, 2011)."
A little rough:
"The Romney Presidency would be a bigger abortion than the one his parents should have gotten (June 11th, 2011)."
Vs. How I feel now:
"Mitt Romney is a candidate for the Presidency in 2012 (April 14th, 2012)."
Extremely harsh but still warranted criticism:
"The only way I will vote for Mitt Romney is if he uses his Mormon witchcraft to curse me, causing me to vote for him against my will, at which point, faced with the knowledge that I've just voted for Romney, I will fling myself out a tenth story window and plunge to my horrible death (April 9th, 2012)."
Vs. My current opinion:
"Yes, I'm planning on voting for Mitt Romney (April 10th, 2012)."
So hopefully this clears a few things up about my stance on Mitt Romney: I support the man fully for the Presidency and plan on voting for him in November, unless Chris Christie jumps into the race.
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