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Brethren and sistren, I know you prayed right alongside me when you heard the terrible story of the fine young man who was ejected from his Ford Fiesta ST after crashing it and wound up dead, with his corpse lodged on a Los Angeles freeway sign.
Now I'd heard that the victim was a good, Christian boy of solid Caucasian stock, but it turns out that wasn't entirely true.
First of all, he wasn't white; he was Armenian.
Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, he practiced Armenia's own queer version of Christianity, which, of course, involves goat sacrifice:
Family of California man killed in freeway accident had performed lamb sacrifice 'to protect him from harm and evil'
And the picture just gets worse and worse. I encourage all of you to visit the GoFundMe page Kardashian set up for this kid. Pay special attention to the part under the heading, "IRONIC BACKSTORY":
That's a heck of a thing, isn't it? Using your friend's death as a springboard to spread your atheism, while simultaneously trying to normalize, in the reader's mind, the bizarre practice of Armenian goat sacrifice?
And speaking of Kardashians, friends, I'm sure you all vividly remember what I had to say about a pregnant Kim Kardashian spending Easter topless and covered in goat's blood!
Yes indeed, my track record on the subject of Armenian goat sacrifice is very strong! You need not have any doubt as to where I stand on this issue!
That said, I would love to hear from some of the pastors here regarding the subject of animal sacrifice, as described in the Bible. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't there a right way to sacrifice a lamb or a goat, a way that would be pleasing to the Lord?
I am reminded of that moment in Genesis when Noah gave the Lord some offerings, and He responded favorably to their pleasant aroma:
I think that sweet smell could very well be at the crux of the matter: Armenians don't smell good even under the best of circumstances, and I'd wager they smell even worse when naked and covered in raw lamb guts.
Could it be that this kid's family's first mistake (besides being Armenian Orthodox instead of Baptist, obviously) was that they didn't prepare Jesus a nice sacrifice of tasty meats, barbecued in accordance with Old Testament tradition?
Now I'd heard that the victim was a good, Christian boy of solid Caucasian stock, but it turns out that wasn't entirely true.
First of all, he wasn't white; he was Armenian.
Secondly, and perhaps more importantly, he practiced Armenia's own queer version of Christianity, which, of course, involves goat sacrifice:
Family of California man killed in freeway accident had performed lamb sacrifice 'to protect him from harm and evil'
The family of a California man who was killed in a gruesome freeway accident had performed a lamb sacrifice "to protect him from harm and evil" five days before his death.
The body of Richard Pananian, 20, ended up on a Los Angeles freeway sign following Friday morning's accident. Authorities say Pananian may have been driving recklessly on the 5 Freeway when his car collided with another vehicle. His car flipped several times, and he was ejected from the vehicle.
Pananian, a Los Angeles native, was one of the most "compassionate people you would ever meet," his cousin Armen Kardashian wrote on a GoFundMe page...
The body of Richard Pananian, 20, ended up on a Los Angeles freeway sign following Friday morning's accident. Authorities say Pananian may have been driving recklessly on the 5 Freeway when his car collided with another vehicle. His car flipped several times, and he was ejected from the vehicle.
Pananian, a Los Angeles native, was one of the most "compassionate people you would ever meet," his cousin Armen Kardashian wrote on a GoFundMe page...
Richard comes from a Christian family that believes in God, and the family has done its best to follow the good book, and live in a righteous way. I myself have lost my faith and question the act of God if he exists. A week ago today on 10/25 the family had done what is called a “matag” or a lamb sacrifice for Richard to protect him from harm and evil. In the Armenian culture sacrifices are done when someone escapes death, as Richards life was once spared. I myself had sat in the car with Richard countless times, and he had a 5 point safety harness that he wore all the time! All the time!! It would be the first thing he did without a reminder. I find it ironic that 5 days after this offering to God, not only did God choose to take this young mans life, but decided to make such a spectacle out of it. If God works in mysterious ways his way remains a mystery to me and has crushed this family as a whole.
And speaking of Kardashians, friends, I'm sure you all vividly remember what I had to say about a pregnant Kim Kardashian spending Easter topless and covered in goat's blood!
Yes indeed, my track record on the subject of Armenian goat sacrifice is very strong! You need not have any doubt as to where I stand on this issue!
That said, I would love to hear from some of the pastors here regarding the subject of animal sacrifice, as described in the Bible. Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't there a right way to sacrifice a lamb or a goat, a way that would be pleasing to the Lord?
I am reminded of that moment in Genesis when Noah gave the Lord some offerings, and He responded favorably to their pleasant aroma:
Genesis 8:20-22
20 And Noah builded an altar unto the Lord; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
21 And the Lord smelled a sweet savour; and the Lord said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man's sake; for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.
20 And Noah builded an altar unto the Lord; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
21 And the Lord smelled a sweet savour; and the Lord said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man's sake; for the imagination of man's heart is evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.
Could it be that this kid's family's first mistake (besides being Armenian Orthodox instead of Baptist, obviously) was that they didn't prepare Jesus a nice sacrifice of tasty meats, barbecued in accordance with Old Testament tradition?
I seem to have forgotten). 
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