[Dr. Santiago Solo]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

But she was revealed to me in her infinite wisdom that you are not patient, but frightened of the imaginary concept of hell! GLORY TO HER! You are so afraid of hell, that you dare not do ANYTHING that might make you risk going there! Well, I suggest you fear the pit, for it is REAL and if you continue on this path, you will know for sure ONLY when it's too late!

And as for the tithing, all scammers shall have their part in the pit! They will reap what they sow!

I am afraid if you keep sowing mockery to this Blessed© Church, you will bring a nice ban to your deluded head... Aeternal damnation? not funny...

[JonathanClement]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

I am afraid if you keep sowing mockery to this Blessed© Church, you will bring a nice ban to your deluded head... Aeternal damnation? not funny...

Of course eternal damnation isn't funny. That's why she sent ME. To FREE you from that fear, because she LOVES you! Way more than you can imagine! You would reject the free gift of freedom? Why?

(*You're not actually serious about banning me, are you? You realize this is all in good humor right, and not an attempt to troll or take down the website?)

*All serious posts are in brackets.

[Dr. Santiago Solo]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Of course eternal damnation isn't funny. That's why she sent ME. To FREE you from that fear, because she LOVES you! Way more than you can imagine! You would reject the free gift of freedom? Why?

(*You're not actually serious about banning me, are you? You realize this is all in good humor right, and not an attempt to troll or take down the website?)

*All serious posts are in brackets.

Well, the thing is I cannot see what is more outrageous, your clear Demon Possession, or your constant repetition of lame, uninventive posts, I would continue, but I have grass to watch grow (and I don't have the power to ban you, only a Pastor or Moderator can, so watch your manners with them and this Holy® Church).

[Wide-Open]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

I am completely sure, for the Lord is my Shepherd, and my Rock

Jonathan, listen to this guy. He may not be a True Christian - the DOF is still investigating, and the LORD knows what they'll come up with - but he does know his rocks!

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Friend, you're just babbling nonsense now. If God was a woman, s/He would need to cut herself off from her creation (I'm not capitalising 'her', because it's not a correct way of referring to Our Lord in the first place) for at least seven days every month, during her unclean time. How could an omnipresent being do that? It just wouldn't make any kind of sense.

(*You're not actually serious about banning me, are you? You realize this is all in good humor right, and not an attempt to troll or take down the website?)

*All serious posts are in brackets.

That's a flat-out lie. This post is as serious as the fires of Hell. But then again, you didn't put brackets around "All serious posts are in brackets", so maybe we're not meant to take that statement seriously? Friend, you are crazy in the head.

[JonathanClement]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Friend, you're just babbling nonsense now. If God was a woman, s/He would need to cut herself off from her creation (I'm not capitalising 'her', because it's not a correct way of referring to Our Lord in the first place) for at least seven days every month, during her unclean time. How could an omnipresent being do that? It just wouldn't make any kind of sense.



That's a flat-out lie. This post is as serious as the fires of Hell. But then again, you didn't put brackets around "All serious posts are in brackets", so maybe we're not meant to take that statement seriously? Friend, you are crazy in the head.

Once again, I point out that the bible is a lie, so, the bit about having to cut Herself off from Her creation is rediculous and unfounded. Why would she need to do that, anyway? If She's the supreme being, which She is, She wouldn't NEED to do that! So, your logic is faulty! Therefore, I SPEAK THE TRUTH!

(And yeah, maybe I'm a bit crazy. Who knows? I mean, I've been going nuts over the diarrhea dump called "zeitgeist". I've NEVER gonna get over that thing... )

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Once again, I point out that the bible is a lie, so, the bit about having to cut Herself off from Her creation is rediculous and unfounded. Why would she need to do that, anyway? If She's the supreme being, which She is, She wouldn't NEED to do that! So, your logic is faulty! Therefore, I SPEAK THE TRUTH!

(And yeah, maybe I'm a bit crazy. Who knows? I mean, I've been going nuts over the diarrhea dump called "zeitgeist". I've NEVER gonna get over that thing... )

You need those demons driving out boy, that's the long and the short of it.

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

(And yeah, maybe I'm a bit crazy. Who knows?

A BIT? - I'd say that's an understatement. If this is what you call a BIT, you probably couldn't hit a bull in the ass with a bass fiddle, you're unsteady young fella...

Get right with Jesus, that'll straighten ya out!

[JonathanClement]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

You need those demons driving out boy, that's the long and the short of it.

Prove to me the demons exist.

[Dr. Santiago Solo]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Prove to me the demons exist.

They are speaking to you, my friend, using you, making you babble incoherencies...

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Prove to me the demons exist.

That is easy.

Next question?

[JonathanClement]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

That is easy.

Next question?

Sorry, try again.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Sorry, try again.

Not scary enough of a demon for you? Well try this tough guy

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Sorry, try again.

Turn with me if you will in your KJV to Mark 5:6-13:

But when he saw Jesus afar off, he ran and worshipped him,

And cried with a loud voice, and said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of the most high God? I adjure thee by God, that thou torment me not. For he said unto him, Come out of the man, thou unclean spirit.
And he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered, saying, My name is Legion: for we are many. And he besought him much that he would not send them away out of the country. Now there was there nigh unto the mountains a great herd of swine feeding. And all the devils besought him, saying, Send us into the swine, that we may enter into them. And forthwith Jesus gave them leave. And the unclean spirits went out, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the sea, (they were about two thousand and were choked in the sea.
Proof positive right there young fella.

[JonathanClement]

Re: Hey, guys! ^.^

Turn with me if you will in your KJV to Mark 5:6-13:

But when he saw Jesus afar off, he ran and worshipped him,

And cried with a loud voice, and said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of the most high God? I adjure thee by God, that thou torment me not. For he said unto him, Come out of the man, thou unclean spirit.
And he asked him, What is thy name? And he answered, saying, My name is Legion: for we are many. And he besought him much that he would not send them away out of the country. Now there was there nigh unto the mountains a great herd of swine feeding. And all the devils besought him, saying, Send us into the swine, that we may enter into them. And forthwith Jesus gave them leave. And the unclean spirits went out, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the sea, (they were about two thousand and were choked in the sea.
Proof positive right there young fella.

When I saw proof, I don't mean people you hate due to your primitive, retarded prejudice, or some 2000 year old book that was written 70 years after Christs time anyway. For such things, I quote a famous internet meme: Pics, or it didn't happen.