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  • #1

    Finally a rational place!

    I would like to say that I'm highly appreciative of this site. I've been reading Brother V's teachings for a while, and I thought I'd finally join the site. I've gone to Westboro Baptist for 19 years, and am a proud member to this date. I found Jesus on my monumental 15th beating from my mother. My favorite bible verse is: Romans6:23(For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.) Can't wait for an amazing time with Landover Baptist.
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  • #2
    Re: Finally a rational place!

    You need to leave that limp wristed closet fag false church at once!

    That bunch of lightweights wouldn't know how to kill and skin a witch this Halloween if they were given a filleting knife and a wooden stake and all the silver bullets they could carry.
    sigpic
    Isaiah 34:6 The sword of the LORD is filled with blood, it is made fat with fatness, and with the blood of lambs and goats, with the fat of the kidneys of rams: for the LORD hath a sacrifice in Bozrah, and a great slaughter in the land of Idumea.

    John 5:46,47 For had ye believed Moses, ye would have believed me: for he wrote of me. But if ye believe not his writings, how shall ye believe my words?

    Join me in scoffing at backwards Muslims clinging to their beliefs in the face of the evidence!
    The truth about volcanos
    Sex and debauchery in public schools
    Faith wins over science (explained for even the very stupid)
    God Cures AIDS - GLORY!
    Desert whale bones prove Great Flood once and for all.

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Finally a rational place!

      Indeed, brother, I must leave that hellhole of a place. Hopefully Landover baptist can cleanse my past from that retched "church".

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Finally a rational place!

        I heard that Westboro allow women to preach from the pulpit!
        In direct conflict with 1 Timothy 2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. and 1 Corinthians 14:34. Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience, as also saith the law
        sigpic

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        • #5
          Re: Finally a rational place!

          Westboro = women speaking in church, and female "pastors."

          WARNING:
          In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
          REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.

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          • #6
            Re: Finally a rational place!

            Some people told that Westboro is fake baptist church... the only thing they want is the attention of the media

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Finally a rational place!

              Originally posted by RobertPaulson View Post
              I would like to say that I'm highly appreciative of this site. I've been reading Brother V's teachings for a while, and I thought I'd finally join the site. I've gone to Westboro Baptist for 19 years, and am a proud member to this date. I found Jesus on my monumental 15th beating from my mother. My favorite bible verse is: Romans6:23(For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.) Can't wait for an amazing time with Landover Baptist.
              That was a terrible introduction. How about starting over? This time, tell us your name, age, gender and location. What church do you really attend? What are some of your favorite Bible verses?

              If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

              If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

              You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

              Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
              Who Will Jesus Damn?

              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

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              • #8
                Re: Finally a rational place!

                Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
                That was a terrible introduction. How about starting over? This time, tell us your name, age, gender and location. What church do you really attend? What are some of your favorite Bible verses?
                My name is David McGowan. I was born on April 27, 1987; and currently sit at 27 years old. I'm a proud man who resides in Saint Clairsville, Ohio. My favorite passage is the Armor of God, found in Ephesians 6:10-18. I apologize for the horrible start, and hope to appease my betters with time.

                P.S. The automated bible citer is KJV 1900. If it doesn't upset my superiors, may I suggest a change to KJV 1600?

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Finally a rational place!

                  I'm confused. Who is Robert Paulson?
                  Things are going to get worse before they get better.

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Finally a rational place!

                    Originally posted by Palmer C. Eldrich View Post
                    I'm confused. Who is Robert Paulson?
                    Great question. Maybe a wolf in a sheep's clothing (Matthew 7:15)?
                    God created fossils to test our faith.

                    * * *

                    My favorite LBC sermons:
                    True Christians are Perfect!
                    True Christian™ Love.
                    Salvation™ made Easy!
                    You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
                    Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
                    Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
                     Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
                    Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
                    The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
                    Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
                    God HATES Rational Thinking!
                    True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Finally a rational place!

                      This fellow may be one of those hackers you hear about; or possibly another Estonian or Roman.
                      God judgeth the righteous, And God is angry with the wicked every day- Psalm 7:11

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Re: Finally a rational place!

                        Originally posted by RobertPaulsonwhoisactuallycalledDaveorsomething View Post
                        ...The automated bible citer is KJV 1900. If it doesn't upset my superiors, may I suggest a change to KJV 1600?...
                        The only difference between the two (that I'm aware of) is the standardization of spelling, making it more easily understood by modern readers. Well, that, and the fact that "KJV 1600" doesn't exist, so I assume you meant "KJV 1611".

                        Why would you have them change to a format that's more difficult to understand for most?

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Finally a rational place!

                          Originally posted by Didymus Much View Post

                          Why would you have them change to a format that's more difficult to understand for most?
                          Because, to quote your own work, the devil's in the details. One minute change could constitute a monumental shift in meaning and context. I would also like to apologize for mis-typing. I did indeed mean KJV 1611.

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            Re: Finally a rational place!

                            Mr McGowan, I'm just as confused as everyone else. Since even the male members are confused, this makes me feel justified. So I put your name into the Google and came up with books about the devil. Are you a devil worshipper in disguise?
                            Let Jesus Christ Wash You Clean
                            in 2016

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              Re: Finally a rational place!

                              A search for David McGowan came up with this for me:

                              Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

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