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  • Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

    May you have a joyful day today - presumably and hopefully the last one before Jesus seizes the opportunity to dislocate you into Heaven. You'll be in good hands there!



    Joel 2:29
    And also upon the servants and upon the handmaids in those days will I pour out my spirit.

    I am relatively certain that your position in Heaven will be among the quite highly-ranked exalted spirits.


    Yours in Christ,

    Elmer
    2 Kings 18:25 - Am I now come up without the LORD against this place to destroy it? The LORD said to me, Go up against this land, and destroy it.



    PREPARE YOURSELF TO RAPTURE WITH THIS MANUAL!
    Check out our Research in Creation Science:

  • #2
    Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

    Another year to Celebrate you are closer to Jesus than EVER!REJOICE! LET'S SING TOGETHER!


    When Jesus kicks at your front door
    How you gonna come?
    With your hands on your head
    Or on the Bible on your hand?
    When the Holy Ghost break in
    How you gonna go?
    Shot down into the flames of Hell
    Or rejoicing up to Heaven?



    You can crush us
    You can bruise us
    But you'd have to answer to
    Oh, the law of Jesus
    1 Thessalonians 4:16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the TRUMP of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first.

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

      Wishing you a truly Rapturous Birthday, dear Sister.

      Vaccinated by the love of Jesus!!!

      Comment


      • #4
        Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

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        • #5
          Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

          Greetings!

          A large spliff is being prepared as a celebratory dream stick even now and it will soon be consumed. First I will have to finish the remarkable document presented by Sistren MitzaLizalor which is both concerning and curious. I have noticed that there seems to be fewer white people than before here in Babylon and elsewhere. As a youth in my home country which is Jamaica I learned about the world from television and it seemed that almost everyone was white. Now there are less white people everywhere. Have they gone to Venus on spaceships?

          Jah Guide!
          Trevor
          Sing unto God, sing praises to his name: Extol him that rideth upon the heavens By his name JAH, and rejoice before him.-Psalms 68:4

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          • #6
            Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

            While I had planned an elaborate party for your birthday, the guest speaker (Benny Hinn) suddenly had to cancel. The DJ has the flu and I couldn’t find the right shade of wrapping paper for your gift. I just decided to put it in the Lord’s hands, Sister. I hope Jesus does something special for you as you near your Heavenly home.
            Proverbs 21:31 KJV 1611:
            “The horse is prepared against the day of battell: but safetie is of the Lord.”

            Lord, may I serve my equine brothers and sisters just as I do my fellow man.
            Amen and Amen

            Comment


            • #7
              Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

              Sister Handmaiden,

              While I may have had little interaction with you on these forums, I am going to give you a most wondrous gift. It’s a prayer to God that he will make your birthday full of splendor and joy today. You’re truly welcome Sister Handmaiden <3. It’s a priceless gift that I hope will bring you happiness.

              Yours in Christ,

              Maxine Levantine (17)
              My name is Maxine Levantine. I am 17 and follow the KJV Bible to a T. If you are wanting to hit on me you can turn away. THIS is reserved for Jesus and my future husband (whoever that may be).

              Comment


              • #8
                Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                May I wish you a most blessed birthday, dear Sister Handmaiden! And may the dear richly bless you today -- and always. And I do thank you for your enriching messages throughout the year, at .

                A blessed birthday to you, Dear,
                Sincerely, Isabella W.
                (Mrs.) Isabella White

                Hebrews 10:19 " Having therefore, brethren, boldness to enter into the holiest by the of "

                Comment


                • #9
                  Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                  Dear Sister,
                  There are few women like you who hold so steadfastly to
                  1 Timothy 2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.
                  as you do.

                  In fact, I can say without fear of contradiction that you have never said an instructive thing in your life.

                  Such flowers of Christ are few and far between – you deserve a happy birthday.
                  sigpic


                  “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                  Author of such illuminating essays as,
                  Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                    Happy Birthday, Beloved Sister in Christ!

                    Here is a very modest cake for you:


                    God created fossils to test our faith.

                    * * *

                    My favorite LBC sermons:
                    True Christians are Perfect!
                    True Christian™ Love.
                    Salvation™ made Easy!
                    You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe the Old Testament.
                    Jesus is impolite. Deal with it.
                    Jesus is xenophobic and so should we.
                    Sanctity of Life is NOT a Biblical Concept.
                    Biblical view on modern-day slavery.
                    The Immorality of the "Universal Declaration of Human Rights."
                    Geneva Conventions vs. The Holy Bible.
                    God HATES Rational Thinking!
                    True Christian™ Man as a spitting image of God.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                      Thank you, my Brothers and Sisters in Christ.

                      The Lord continues to bless me richly. Yesterday, I visited the local library and placed educational tracts in all the books in the religion section.


                      The tracts explain that other people have religion, which is man trying to make himself good before God. Whereas Christians have a lifestyle, which is living in joy because God made us acceptable to Himself by covering us with His Son's blood.


                      Other religions cannot save because they depend on man's efforts to keep commandments and obtain salvation. Only Christianity takes the sin away with miracle whitening blood. No effort required on our part. Jesus did the work so we don't have to.(tm)
                      His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                      Guns For God and the Economy

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                      • #12
                        Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                        Happy Birthday, young lady! It is so rare in this fast paced day and age to find young women with such grace and a deep and passionate dignity such as you carry.
                        Truly God blessed us all with His Divine Creation of you. I know you are always looking for ways to better yourself. My wife, Mrs. Hutchins (anyone seen her recently?) had this book. You may like it.
                        Attached Files
                        Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
                        Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
                        Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
                        Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
                        Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
                        Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.

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                        • #13
                          Re: Happy Birthday Handmaiden, our Dear Sister!

                          [ATTACH]28462[/ATTACH]
                          I'm willing to overlook your importunity on this occasion because I was providing some research to Handmaiden for her birthday and you've spotted the important discovery. Actually it appears twice.
                          PAGE 5 I’m the first to establish actual physical contact between the two planets.”

                          PAGE 7 So far I’ve landed seven times, and mixed with the people for a month each time., without their being aware of of my identity as a visitor from another globe.”

                          PAGE 7 Far below he could see the Earth, a large sphere of light surrounded by darkness.

                          Twice means I'm not sure if you could remember what was on page 5 by the time you reached page 7 making 3 altogether. From the style of writing clearly this is aimed at 7- or 8-year-olds and the insidious promotion of Ball Theory is omnipresent. No mention is made of other theories and perhaps I'm too liberal but more than one shape is possible that doesn't contradict God. Ball, globe or sphere is not one of them. Additionally, although anyone can see Venus and although The Bible acknowledges the existence of planets, the overarching theme of the Earth being just another planet (like Venus in this case) directly contradicts Scripture.

                          And yet here it is a central theme of the story. The result can only be intentional, to establish by insinuation that God doesn't know anything about Creation or alternatively that He's a big fat liar, pants on fire, never listen to God. I was frankly shocked to see this so early in my research and knew that the first few pages would be suitable for a birthday post.

                          Like Daniel we are all interested in science and know the importance of considering all the alternatives, not just presenting one theory and ignoring everything else. Let's face it: even in a single document written by a single author the word for "ball" is used but when describing the Earth the word for "ball" is rejected.

                          Isaiah 22:18, 40:22
                          Attached Files

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