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  • Gabriel Reproba
    Head Attorney of Landover's Legal Team
    The Most Honest Lawyer in America
    True Christian™
    • Nov 2009
    • 2479

    #31
    Re: Holocaust Jokes

    Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
    Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.


    I see what jew did there.

    I think most people will nazi it your way, though.
    Yours In Christ,

    Gabriel Reproba, Esq. (Lawyer for the Lord)

    Further reading to help you become a True Christian™

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    The One Sin Jesus Says He Won't EVER Forgive!
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    Science: People are Only Islamic Because They are Depressed!

    Reading only the parts of the Bible your pastor tells you to (those that make you feel warm and fuzzy) is nothing but mental and spiritual masturbation. Read the WHOLE Bible to find out what Christianity is REALLY all about! Only then can you talk to us about why we try so hard to save people from Hell.

    Comment

    • Purity14
      Forum Member
      Forum Member
      • Jun 2010
      • 37

      #32
      Re: Holocaust Jokes

      Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
      Hey come on now! Stop making holocaust jokes, they are so hurtful Anne Frankly I won't stand for it.


      Indeed, they are certainly out of mein kampf-ortzone

      Comment

      • Samuel Coleridge
        Unsaved trash
        • Nov 2009
        • 615

        #33
        Re: Holocaust Jokes

        What do you call 6 million dead Jews? The Holocaust.
        What do you call 12 million dead or displaced Palestinians? A nation's right to defend itself.

        Yours in killing the funny,
        Sam
        Proverbs 25:21-22 If thine enemy be hungry, give him bread to eat; and if he be thirsty, give him water to drink:
        For thou shalt heap coals of fire upon his head, and the LORD shall reward thee.

        Comment

        • Brother Enoch
          The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
          True Christian™
          • Jun 2008
          • 4392

          #34
          Re: Holocaust Jokes

          Originally posted by Samuel Coleridge View Post
          What do you call 6 million dead Jews? The Holocaust.
          What do you call 12 million dead or displaced Palestinians?
          Trespassers

          Yours in killing the funny,
          Sam
          Enoch
          Yours in bringing back the funny.

          (Funny because it's true...)

          Comment

          • BelieverInGod
            Fourm Member
            Forum Member
            • Feb 2010
            • 9269

            #35
            Re: Holocaust Jokes

            Drama queen

            Comment

            • Rev. Jim Osborne
              True Christian™ Televangelist
              Director of Fundraising and Tithing
              On the Look Out for Wife #6!
              True Christian™
              • Jun 2009
              • 8622

              #36
              Re: Holocaust Jokes

              What is a Jew's biggest dilemma?

              Free Pork.




              How do you make a telephone wire.

              Let two Jews fight over a penny.

              Watch the #1 Televangelist Gospel Hour in the World! "Turn or Burn: Accept Christ or Go to Hell with Rev. Jim Osborne." Check your local cable listings.

              Comment

              • Brother Enoch
                The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
                True Christian™
                • Jun 2008
                • 4392

                #37
                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                What's the goal of a jewish football game?

                To get the quarter back.

                Comment

                • Brother Enoch
                  The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
                  True Christian™
                  • Jun 2008
                  • 4392

                  #38
                  Re: Holocaust Jokes

                  Did you hear about the new Jewish car?

                  Stops on a dime. And picks it up.

                  Comment

                  • Brother Enoch
                    The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
                    True Christian™
                    • Jun 2008
                    • 4392

                    #39
                    Re: Holocaust Jokes

                    Two jews meet on the street. The first jew says 'so sorry to hear about that fire that burned down your store last Thursday.' The second jew says 'no, no that's next Thursday."

                    Comment

                    • Titus Templeton
                      Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade
                      Jesus macht frei
                      True Christian™
                      • Aug 2010
                      • 5912

                      #40
                      Re: Holocaust Jokes

                      Originally posted by David Rothstein View Post
                      What's the difference between real Jesus and a picture of Jesus?

                      It only takes one nail to hang up the picture.
                      Have you no shame?
                      You're people killed Jesus Christ and now you make fun of him.
                      -The Parable of the white laundry and the black man
                      -Scientific proof that GAY SEX IS UNHYGIENIC!
                      -Holocaust Jokes
                      -Diarrhea: The Va​ginal Lubrication of the Homosexuals
                      -Anne Frank vs. Adolf Hitler: Who was the worse person?
                      -10 Reasons why GOD HATES FRANCE!
                      -5 Reasons why GOD HATES LEAGUE OF LEGENDS!
                      -Today I am declaring War against Woman's Rights!

                      Comment

                      • Titus Templeton
                        Director of the German "Holy-caust" Evangelical Crusade
                        Jesus macht frei
                        True Christian™
                        • Aug 2010
                        • 5912

                        #41
                        Re: Holocaust Jokes

                        -The Parable of the white laundry and the black man
                        -Scientific proof that GAY SEX IS UNHYGIENIC!
                        -Holocaust Jokes
                        -Diarrhea: The Va​ginal Lubrication of the Homosexuals
                        -Anne Frank vs. Adolf Hitler: Who was the worse person?
                        -10 Reasons why GOD HATES FRANCE!
                        -5 Reasons why GOD HATES LEAGUE OF LEGENDS!
                        -Today I am declaring War against Woman's Rights!

                        Comment

                        • James Dewitt
                          #63 on Forbes'...but #1 in Jesus's Heart
                          • Jan 2010
                          • 6267

                          #42
                          Re: Holocaust Jokes

                          How many Joos does it take to heat a concentration camp?

                          Roughly 6 million, they are not energy star rated.

                          Comment

                          • Brother Temperance
                            Senior Usher
                            True Christian™ missionary to the Unsaved Kingdom
                            A very nice young man
                            True Christian™
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 15621

                            #43
                            Re: Holocaust Jokes

                            Originally posted by Brother Enoch View Post
                            On a more serious note, I heard World War II and the holocaust were actually planned and instigated by Zionists to lead to the formation of Israel when Germany was defeated. They sacrificed 6 million of their own, and 60 million from other nations (mostly Christians, except for the japs) to bring about the birth (rebirth) of Israel. Anyone have any more on this?
                            Well, as I've said,
                            Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                            Q: What do you call the person responsible for the Holocaust?

                            A: A dirty Jew.
                            Hitler was a Jew so it seems plausible. However, I think this explanation is ultimately mis-leading. Yes, the holocaust only happened so Israel could exist, but that's because God sent it. I'll let Pastor Hagee explain:
                            Originally posted by Pastor John Hagee
                            The Prophet Jeremiah... paints a vivid picture of the human agents God intended to use to bring the Jewish people back to Israel: 'But now I will send for many fisherman', declares the Lord', 'and they will catch them. After that I will send for many hunters and they will hunt them down on every mountain and hill and from the crevices of the rocks.'
                            I believe this indicates the positive comes before the negative.....
                            First, God sent the fisherman to Israel. These were the Zionists, men like Theodore Herzl who called for the Jews of Europe and the World to come to Palestine and establish the Jewish state. The Jews were encouraged to escape while there was still time....
                            [Then] God sent the hunters. The hunter is one who pursues his target with force and fear. No one could see the horror of the Holocaust coming, but the force and fear of Hitler's Nazis drive the Jewish people back to the only home God ever intended for the Jews to have-Israel.... I am stricken with awe and wonder at his boundless love for Israel and the Jewish people...
                            Praise!
                            O Lord our God, help us to tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it--for our sakes who adore Thee, Lord, blast their hopes, blight their lives, protract their bitter pilgrimage, make heavy their steps, water their way with their tears, stain the white snow with the blood of their wounded feet! We ask it, in the spirit of love, of Him Who is the Source of Love, and Who is the ever-faithful refuge and friend of all that are sore beset and seek His aid with humble and contrite hearts. Amen.



                            God being truth, justice, goodness, beauty, power, and life, man is falsehood, iniquity, evil, ugliness, impotence, and death. God being master, man is the slave. Incapable of finding justice, truth, and eternal life by his own effort, he can attain them only through a divine revelation... he who desires to worship God must harbor no childish illusions about the matter, but bravely renounce his liberty and humanity.

                            Comment

                            • Brother Enoch
                              The Godliest Man in Godless Canuckistan
                              True Christian™
                              • Jun 2008
                              • 4392

                              #44
                              Re: Holocaust Jokes

                              Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                              Well, as I've said,

                              Hitler was a Jew so it seems plausible. However, I think this explanation is ultimately mis-leading. Yes, the holocaust only happened so Israel could exist, but that's because God sent it. I'll let Pastor Hagee explain:

                              Praise!
                              Wow! You pre-answered my question. Excellent anticipation on your part.

                              Comment

                              • Rev. M. Rodimer
                                Honorary True Christian™
                                Forum Member
                                • May 2008
                                • 13996

                                #45
                                Re: Holocaust Jokes

                                Originally posted by Brother Temperance View Post
                                Well, as I've said,

                                Hitler was a Jew so it seems plausible. However, I think this explanation is ultimately mis-leading. Yes, the holocaust only happened so Israel could exist, but that's because God sent it. I'll let Pastor Hagee explain:

                                Praise!
                                Now, that IS funny! God so loved the Jews, He helped Hitler to starve, torture, rape, and nearly exterminate them, all so He could cast them into His Lake of Fire for all eternity!
                                Bible boring? Nonsense!
                                Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                                You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                                Comment

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